


Spellbound and Hellbound

by ShatteredGlassHouse



Series: Hartwin Hogwarts AU [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst, DADA teacher Harry, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, Hogwarts, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Masturbation, Pining, Pining Eggsy, Roxy Is a Good Bro, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-07 07:35:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 30,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5448485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShatteredGlassHouse/pseuds/ShatteredGlassHouse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eggsy's sure that he’s feeling something more towards his professor, Harry Hart—ex-Auror, Defence Against the Dark arts teacher.  He was just not sure what, and that he refused to acknowledge the flutter in his heart as a crush.  For the past two years, Eggsy's managed to keep his reoccurring feelings for Harry quiet. He planned to keep things that way until graduation, but, as Eggsy's familiar with, things never go the way they're expected too. Maybe, if he tried hard enough, he'd make it through the school year with minimum damage.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was a story I wrote after a marathon of Harry Potter and Kingsman for the third time. This was originally supposed to be around 8000 words, but if anyone knows me, I can't stick to word limits. 
> 
> Thank you to my friend for the motivation and for letting me whine and complain as I bounced ideas off of her.
> 
> Thank you to [harryhartrainmaker](http://harryhartrainmaker.tumblr.com/) for beat-ing this story for me.
> 
> And an extra thank you to scribblyscratch tumblr for the amazing art. I love it and you should totally check out her work!! [art](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5443253/)

It was the end of class, the end of the day.  Phew.  As much as he loved his classes...particularly this one... Eggsy couldn’t help but feel exhausted at the end of a school day.  Still, one thing he always had to look forward to where his end of the week conversations with Professor Hart.  He felt his face heat up as he approached the older man's desk, only just keeping his blush in check.  Just one look at the man during class and Eggsy would feel a little warm rush spread through him, and it was not from his school robe.

On his way from his Transfiguration class, he gave Roxy a rushed ‘catch up with you later’, receiving a disapproving shake of her head.  She didn’t need to be told where he was heading. She knew the routine by now.  

It wasn’t like these conversations were new.  Since fourth-year Professor Hart had offered help to Eggsy, be it that it was with school work, school life **,** or advice for anything else.

Every Friday after his last class, he would meet Harry Hart for an hour or so before supper.  He was the first to admit that lately, their private sessions have steered from professional to friendly conversation. Harry still didn’t share much of his past when his student asked, but Eggsy was starting to open up, sharing some fears about life after graduation, something he’s yet to tell Roxy.

He stood patiently near the desk, waiting for Harry to turn his attention from the parchment he was scribbling notes onto him.  When the door slammed firmly shut behind the last student, Harry glanced up and smiled brightly at Eggsy.  “Hello, Eggsy.”

A warm feeling embarrassingly filled the young wizard swiftly, it was a smile he couldn’t help but return with his own crooked smirk.  He remembered when Professor Hart had called him Gary during his fourth year when Harry had just taken over the role of the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher after Professor Arnold’s retirement.   It took about a month to convince the older wizard to address him as ‘Eggsy’.

Harry picked up his quill and started writing again.  He didn’t look up again for a good minute or so, which was odd since normally Harry took Eggsy to his office or had him help clean up.

“Class is done.”  Eggsy shifted on his feet, fixing his school bag on his shoulder.  “And s’Friday.  Or did ya forget?”  His tone was a little cheeky.  Harry Hart forgetting something was a rarity.  

“I did not forget, Eggsy.  After all, I was the teacher who dismissed my students.”  The older wizard lifted his head and arched his brows.

Eggsy grunted and dropped his bag to the ground, taking a closer step to the desk.  “Wot you working on there?”  He nodded his head to the letter on the desk even though Harry didn’t look up.

“It’s a business matter, Eggsy.  And I have reminded you more than once about prying.”  The tone wasn’t harsh, but lightly reprimanded the younger man.

The boy rolled his eyes.  It’s not his fault that he’s curious.  He wasn’t trying to pry, he was just wondering what had gotten his professor’s attention when this time was usually reserved for their weekly talks.

“Sorry, but it seems that I will have to cancel our meeting tonight.”  

The way Harry said ‘meeting’ put a bitter taste in Eggsy’s mouth.  He always looked forward to their time together and thought of them as more than a ‘meeting’.  The word made this seem like it was an obligation of Harry’s.

“I have to drop this letter off to Professor King, but first I must attend a council with Professor Valentine.”  

Eggsy barely held back a snide remark about how the Headmaster could wait for a bit.  This wasn't the first time Harry canceled on him, but it was the first time this year and the earliest.  This was just their third conversation and already Harry was planning meetings during _their_ time.

“Oh.”  He tried to not sound so dejected, but even he had to cringe at his tone.  God, could he sound more like a child?  “Right.  Guess I’ll see ya-”

“Nonsense.  Come along,” the professor cut in, as he stood up and buttoned his suit jacket.  He grabbed the letter, slipping the parchment into the left inside pocket of his jacket.  “Unfortunately you can’t sit in on the meeting, but walk with me.  I’ve been meaning to discuss your in-class participation.”

Shit.  Maybe he should have just left when Harry dismissed him.  He wasn’t in the mood to discuss his participation or lack thereof.  It wasn’t like he’d ever skipped a class.  He’d never do that to Harry.  Other classes, sure.  Talking to Harry once a week wasn’t enough, so he may or may not have found himself anxiously waiting for second period on Tuesday and even more importantly last period on Thursday.

“‘Scuse me?”  Eggsy picked up his bag and slid it over his shoulder, waiting for Harry to lead the way.

Harry held the door open for Eggsy, being the gentleman that he always insisted on being.  Really, Eggsy doubted half the school gave a shit if their professor was a wanker or had a wand up his arse.  

“It has come to my attention that you don’t put even half the effort into some of your classes as you do for others.”  They walked down the hall, passing several students who greeted Harry politely out of obligation.

“‘S not like I skip.” _Your class_ was what he wanted to add because it was true.  DADA was really the only class he’d put his best effort forward in and it had more to do with the teacher than the subject itself.  “Been to every class since the start.”

The professor hummed and stared straight ahead.  “While you are right, Eggsy, I am talking about several other classes.  I’ve had a few teachers inquire how you’ve received the O.W.L.s you did on the minimum requirement.”

The comment rubbed him the wrong way.  Yes, he may not be as smart as Roxy or half the others in the class, but he always tried his best.  He only skipped the classes he knew he was hopeless in, or that wouldn’t help him in his goal of becoming an Auror.

“You’re a bright student, Eggsy,” Harry said with much more assurance than the young wizard thought he deserved.  He had only gotten this far by a stroke of luck, and thanks to an old (well thirty-seven) ex-Auror taking him under his wing.  

He wasn’t sure what Harry had seen in him all those years ago, but Eggsy knew one thing, and that was that he would not be standing here with the opportunity of a promising career after graduation without the man walking next to him.

“But you lack discipline.  You do your schoolwork to the point where you feel like you’ll get the mark you think you deserve and not what you _actually_ deserve.  Several of the papers you’ve turned into me have been some of the best I’ve seen from a student in your year.”

As if he wasn’t already trying to slow his heart rate from standing less than three inches from Harry, that complement certainly didn’t help.  He felt hot at the back of his neck and cleared his suddenly dry throat.   

“You’re jus’ saying tha’ so I feel like tryin’ better.”

Harry glanced down at Eggsy and tutted.  “You don’t give yourself enough credit.  You’ve gotten this far because of _you_.  While I have helped and given you the assistance you needed, you’re the one who had the choice to use the help or toss it aside.  I’m grateful you chose the former.”  

Eggsy ducked his head and stared at his feet; the floor suddenly became more interesting.  He knew without a doubt that the blush was impossible to hide.  The halls were dim with the fire and night sky but Harry had an uncanny way of reading him, even if his emotions weren’t in plain sight.  He wanted to be confident like he acted in class, giving off some cheeky remark about how Divinations wasn’t going to do fuck all in the long run of becoming an Auror.  Yet, something about just having Harry’s piercing gaze on only him and pointing out how he shouldn’t doubt himself like he does make it hard for him to form words.  It also didn’t help when his every other thought was about those gorgeous brown eyes that reminded him of whiskey.  

“Just sayin’ tha’, bruv, so I don’ give up on ya,” Eggsy replied cheekily (it’s the best he can do) and smirked at Harry’s raised eyebrow at being called ‘bruv’.  It made him feel better like he had more control of this situation.

“I am your professor, Eggsy.  You will address me properly even if you feel comfortable around me.”  Eggsy bit his lips and ducked his head, this time to hide the amused smile crossing his face.  The older wizard seemed mildly uncomfortable with the small slip up.   

Harry stopped, feet making barely any noise, while Eggsy’s squeaked on the tiles.  They were now standing in front of the large and ugly stone gargoyle that blocked the entrance to the Headmaster’s office.

“And unfortunately, this is where our conversation must end. I’m already late, and you should go and get started on that paper I assigned yesterday.  I trust it will be on my desk by your next class.”

That was another issue about being a little too close with Professor Hart, he had no excuse for late work, which meant, the whole weekend was going to be spent with Roxy pushing him to complete it.

“Already started,” Eggsy responded, which was a lie. Harry knew it too but chose to ignore it.

“Excellent, I look forward to reading it. Goodnight, Eggsy. Enjoy your evening.” It was a dismissal and Eggsy didn’t need to be told twice to leave.  He walked away, leaving the professor standing in front of the blocked entrance, only looking back once to wish him a good weekend. Eggsy doubted he’d be seeing him while being stuck in the library all day.

*****

The first Hogsmeade trip of the year was during the first week of October, it was a chilly Saturday morning.  Eggsy was wearing a black track jacket with white stripes down the arms and jeans, while Roxy was in a thick maroon jumper and jeans.

“Fuck,” the wizard gritted as they walked down the long path to the small village.  For having been summer not two weeks ago it was stupidly cold, it was like the weather decided to have a good laugh and make it feel more like winter than autumn.  “When did it get so bloody cold?  Practically freezing my arse off.”

“You’re so dramatic, Eggsy.  Next time don’t dress like it’s summer.”  Roxy looked pointedly at her friend’s jacket, which was not suitable for the nippy wind.  

Roxy Morton was Eggsy best mate.  Considering she was in Ravenclaw and _much_ smarter than Eggsy (his words), the two still spent most of their free time together.  Roxy was slim and petite with long blonde hair.   

“It was warm yesterday.”  The young wizard shoved his hands into his pockets, trying to keep his fingers from going red.

“And now it’s not. Stop complaining, we’re almost there.”  Roxy brushed a few strands from her face.   and nodded ahead.  Small, pointed buildings were just coming into view.  He could just make some of the shops.

They fell into light conversation.  Roxy started to vent about the other seventh year Ravenclaws.  She has had a particular issue with two girls who have always tried to copy her schoolwork, refusing to do it on their own.  And the same thing was happening this year.

“This is our last year.  What the hell do they think will happen to them during exam time!?  They can’t copy off each other.”

“Not everyone is as ace as you, Rox.  You’re top of most classes.”  Except for Defence Against the Dark Arts, but they both knew that.  “They’re daft.”

The witch let out a soft laugh.  She was one of the best students in their year—the best in her house’s year, but that didn’t mean she could start pissing around like Eggsy and some of his friends did.

“And you’re an idiot.  I know you haven’t started your potions assignment.  You know, the one due this Monday.”  They reached the little village, many students having already beaten them there, but they used the walk more for leisure than as a chance to race.

The village was filled with excited chatter from visiting witches and wizards, as well as Hogwarts students. The sun was out but dark clouds were coming in, creating the feel of a storm brewing.

“So, Zonko’s or Honeydukes?”  They stopped just at the edge of the path, moving aside for a couple of third years to walk past.  In the previous years, they always had a list of places they went to.  Honeydukes and Zonko’s Joke Shop were the first two stops, then they wandered over to a few other shops before going to the Three Broomsticks for a drink. Then Eggsy would insist on them checking out the Shirking Shake.  Not all the time, but a fair few.

“Honeydukes.  ‘M hungry.  Been fancying myself some sweets.  Desserts only get you so far.”  Like he didn’t eat more than his fair share of cake and pudding at dessert, he needed to worry about when food wasn’t being served.

They spent well over the planned time since Eggsy couldn’t decide on which sweets he wanted.  There were too many options and he could only fit so much into his pockets.  Roxy wouldn’t appreciate his use of an extension charm for the purpose of buying more treats.  He finally settled on his usual picks.

They walked out of the shop, Roxy laughing at Eggsy as he oh so elegantly bit into three jelly slugs at once.  She’d bought herself a few treats, but she had restraint and could wait until they got back to the castle.  

“If you choke, I am not helping you.”  Roxy giggled again when Eggsy said something around his mouthful of sweets.  He really was an idiot, but he was her best mate and they’ve known each other for too long for this to be abnormal.  “I want to go to Zonko’s.  Let’s go.”

They walk past a couple of shops passing Charlie, who was standing outside of the post office with a few mates, laughing at something probably as dimwitted as they were.  

Charlie, Rufus, and Hugo were Slytherins in their year.  They were all wankers. (As Eggsy had called them back in third year.)  Hugo and Rufus were really just Charlie’s followers.  Charlie was the leader and a git.  

Roxy started to pick up speed in her steps when the joke shop came into view but was suddenly dragged back by a strong grip.

“Eggsy, what the-?” she glanced at the wizard with furrow eyebrow.  Eggsy still had his hand on her bicep, staring ahead at two figures.  “Oh.”  Realization clicked and she rolled her eyes.

“Oh.”  Realization clicked and she rolled her eyes.

Harry Hart was standing by the Three Broomsticks.  He was in a black overcoat instead of the usual cloak they see teachers wear and Eggsy had to admit to himself that the man pulled it off nicely.  

He was so focused on his professor that he almost didn’t realize the man standing beside Harry until he let out a laugh.  The man was tall and bald, a pair of horn-rimmed glasses were perched on his nose.  Instead of a black coat, his was donning a charcoal grey one.

“Who’s that with him?”  She’d never seen the man before, but for some reason, he looked familiar.

Eggsy watched the two men carefully, eyes following them as they walked to the entrance of the inn.  “Merlin. I think.”

“And how do you know this?” the witch demanded, crossing her arms across her chest and squaring her stance.

“A photo from his office.  He’s the head of the Auror department.  Harry was telling me…”

“Mm-hmm,” Roxy smirked and arched an eyebrow.  “You would know that from all the time you’ve spent in that room.”

The wizard glared at his friend, but they both knew she was right.  In all the time he had spent with Harry since his fourth year he could certainly say he knew things about the ex-Auror that none of the other students knew, not even Roxy.  She may be his best mate, but he’s not about to spill another man’s secrets.

He knew that Harry had been in Gryffindor and had been the top student for his house from third year until seventh.  While there were legends of Harry and his time as an Auror, Eggsy knew which ones were true and which were fake.  Those had been some of the first questions he’d asked, and while Harry had been reluctant to answer, he indulged the fourteen-year-old boy’s curiosity.  He knew that he retired from being an Auror (barely past forty) because of a mission gone wrong.  He had been injured and hadn’t known if he was going to make it.  When he did pull through, he had wanted out of the field.  

Well, it was either retirement or being taken off-field missions permanently.  He decided teaching was better than staying stuck behind a desk, filing papers for other Aurors.

Merlin and Harry disappeared through the door, leaving the young witch and wizard still staring without their knowing.

“Fancy a drink, Rox?” He gave the blonde a face that could be best described as up to no good.  He only used that smile when he wanted something but wouldn’t come right out and ask for it.

“Oh?  And it has nothing do with gaping at a certain professor?”  Roxy gave him a shit-eating grin, she could read him clear as day.  

Eggsy grunted and narrowed his eyes.  “Oh, shut your gob.”  He playfully nudged her, but led the way to the door.

He opened the door before a firm blow landed on the side of his head.  “Oi!  What was that for?”

He turned to glare at Roxy who was smiling innocently.

“Sorry.  Was reaching for the door.”

“By my head?”  He didn’t want to admit it, but the girl had some strength to her.

“I missed.”

She brushed past Eggsy and stepped into the warmth.  The pub area was buzzing.  Many Hogwarts students had already claimed tables.  There were a few teachers standing in one corner, talking with some of the residents of the inn.  The duo claimed a table near the stairs, giving Eggsy the perfect view of Harry and his friend—Merlin?  He was sure that’s who was with his professor.  

They ordered their drinks, which took next to no time to come.  Eggsy grabbed his almost as soon as it was placed on the wooden surface.  He finished nearly half of it in a few large gulps.  

His gaze was still fixed on his professor, ignoring any conversation Roxy was trying to have with him.  Harry and Merlin were still standing by their table, talking with a middle-aged woman who was wearing deep red robes and had her blonde—turning silver hair tied in a tight bun.  They looked to be deep in conversation.  Harry fiddled with his drink, swirling the dark liquid in the glass tumbler.  He lifted the glass to his lips and fished off the rest.  

“Eggsy,” Roxy hissed.  “Quit staring.  They’re going to notice.”

She may have been right, but he couldn’t stop himself from looking.  Even when Harry looked his way; instead of shying away and pretending that he hadn’t just been ogling his teacher, Eggsy raised his hand and gave a small wave.

The older wizard smiled and touched his friend’s shoulder.  He said something to him as he cocked his head in the two teens’ direction.  The baldheaded wizard glanced over at them and smiled.  

“Shit,” Eggsy muttered and glanced warningly at Roxy.

“Eggsy, lovely to see you out here!” the professor greeted his student, momentarily ignoring Roxy.    

Eggsy looked up at Harry, smiling widely.  It was a smile he used for no one else, except maybe Roxy occasionally.  This smile was full of emotion and sincerity.  It was a far cry from the cocky grin or closed-mouth smile he would give to everyone else.

“ ’M always here when I can be.”  He shrugged and gave a wink.  His eyes were warmer and sparkled in the dim light.  “Neva seen you ‘ere before.”

“Mmm.”  Harry nodded and smiled gently. “I usually use these trips to visit some old friends.  Today it just so happens that one decided to come to me.”  He was clearly talking about Merlin, but didn’t offer up any introductions.

The student and teacher continue talking, each ignoring their companions, which didn’t bother Roxy at all.  She was too busy watching the man standing next to Harry.  He was watching Professor Hart carefully, almost as if he was monitoring what the wizard was saying.  It sort of reminded her of…  No.  It couldn’t be.  Does Harry…?

“Hello, Miss Morton.”  Harry finally acknowledged the witch’s presence, pulling her from her thoughts.  

“Good afternoon, Professor,” she greeted politely while flickering her gaze from Harry to his friend, who he had not yet thought to introduce.

The man cleared his throat and nudged Harry’s shoulder.  “Oi, gonna ignore me like I’m not standing right next to you?  Where are your manners, Harry?"

“Oh, yes.  Allow me to introduce an old friend of mine, Merlin.”  Harry’s eyes flickered from Roxy’s and landed on Eggsy’s, where they stayed.  “We worked together at the Ministry.  Merlin is the head of the Auror department.”

So Eggsy was right.  That’s why he looks familiar!  Roxy’s seen his picture in the paper a few times.  Every time there was some big break in underground rings or the recapture of an escaped prisoner, the Auror department got the recognition and that usually meant a brief mention of the head of the department.  Eggsy had told her that, but even he had sounded unsure.

“Merlin, this is Eggsy Unwin.  My top student.” Roxy’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.  and she had to bite her lip to stop a smile forming as she took in her friend’s expression wide-eyed expression.  

“Unwin?”  He glanced at Harry from the corner of his eye but didn’t say anything else.  The professor frowned, even eyed the Auror warningly.

“Yes.  Eggsy here has demonstrated excellent participation in my class.”  Eggsy smiled proudly and tipped his chin up in a nod.

“Mm, yes.  Professor Hart has told me you are rather gifted with nonverbal spells.  It’s a great skill to have in the field.”

The young wizard preened under the praise.  He straightened up just a little bit, but Roxy could see the twitch of his hands.  She knew he was trying to keep his cool.  Being praised by other people besides Harry was rare.  Usually, most of the professors were scolding Eggsy over his participation in class.  This revelation also meant that Harry had talked to Merlin about him.  He had actually been mentioned in conversations with Harry’s friends!

“You’d make an excellent candidate,” the Auror added, “so long as everything doesn’t go tits up.  Still early.”

Roxy pursed her lips at the mildly hidden insult, but Eggsy was still smiling.  He was effectively hiding any sign that could show if the comment pissed him off or not.

“Still early,” Harry mirrored, turning his gaze to his friend.  “And yet Eggsy’s current marks have shown no difference when compared to last year’s.”

Merlin rolled his eyes and pulled at his jacket.  He made a face that could best be described as unamused, but it seemed almost out of place with the context of the conversation.  The older wizard caught Roxy’s stare and gave the young witch a tense smile.

“As pleasant as this little ‘talk’ has been, Harry, we really best be on our way.  I would much rather talk with Amelia over tea than supper.”

Realization seemed to hit Harry as he opened his mouth in a small ‘ah’.  “We’d best be off then.”  He smiled at Merlin, a little too wide, eyes wrinkling at the corners behind his tortoiseshell square-framed glasses.  Almost like he was taking the piss with him.  “It was lovely seeing you.”  A large, warm hand landed on the young wizard’s shoulder, and Eggsy had to bite his cheek to keep a small gasp at bay.  “I will see you in class.  Good day, Miss Morton.”  Harry nodded and followed Merlin out of the building, unaware of the pair of light blue eyes following his every move.

When the door shut behind the two wizards, briefly letting in a gust of bitter wind, Eggsy turned his attention to Roxy.

She sighed heavily and shook her head.  “Eggsy, it doesn't take very much to see that you're mad about Professor Hart.”  She sipped her butterbeer nonchalantly, smirking around the glass’ rim when Eggsy’s jaw dropped.  

“You’re mental.”  He scoffed; he was _not_ that transparent.  One of the things he has always prided himself on was his ability to hide his feelings.  Having the upbringing he did, one learned to hide certain emotions to protect one’s self.  “S’not like that.”

Roxy moved her glass in circles on the table, splashing a few drops of the butterscotch liquid onto the oak table.  “Eggsy…” her voice was softer and held a sympatric tone.

Eggsy didn’t like it.  He hated having people feel sorry for him.  He could take care of himself.  He’d been doing it ever since his dad had died, and especially since Dean had come into their lives.

He quickly collected himself and folded his arms on the table.  “Don’t matter or nothin’.  S’neva gonna happen.”

She knew about his ‘little’ crush on Harry.  Before, she teased him that he worshiped the ground their DADA professor walked on, but it was obvious by sixth year that Eggsy’s feelings for Harry surpassed admiration.  It was a full-blown crush.  Harry more than once made it into their conversations during free period.  Eggsy also hasn’t realized it, but he has quoted Harry more than once… In a day.

“What are you saying?”  He wasn’t thinking about actually saying something, right?  She knew Eggsy could act out irrationally.  His cheek has gotten him in trouble more in the past years than she could count.  But he wouldn’t be that dense as to actually say something, right?  She just hoped that Eggsy’s habit of keeping things to himself was put to use this one time.  It was for his sake.

*****

The Friday before Halloween found Eggsy in Harry’s office, sitting in the plush armchair across his desk.  Harry was busy marking several third-year papers on… What did they learn that year?  Some lessons stood out in his memory more than others, but third year was a bit of a blur.  Professor Arnold wasn’t what he would call a brilliant professor.  Most of the lessons he’d learned in his school years before Harry had kind of faded.

Roxy was always happy to remind him it was because he _always_ listened to Harry, no matter how mundane the topic.  He may like Harry a bit more than a student should admire their teacher, but he could keep his feelings under control.  He’d been doing it for two years.  All he had to do was stay quiet for another seven months and he’d be fine.  It wasn’t like Harry allowed much opportunity to confess secrets.  He asked about his family, mates, and school, but something like ‘young love’ was ‘Insufferable to watch,’ because ‘children lose themselves in the idea of love.’

That line had hurt, but it wasn’t like he had ever planned to confess to Harry Hart, even after graduation.  That kind of confession took courage or a great amount of drinking.  The former he did not have, not for this, and the second well... he wasn’t about to get sloshed on school grounds.  

“Honestly, do these students just wait until the night before to finish an essay?”  Harry made another stroke with his quill and frowned in distaste.

Eggsy wanted to say something about how he wasn’t exactly innocent of that technique, but that may result in a light reprimand from Harry, and he didn’t want that.  

“This one is just directly copied right out of the textbook.  Thick heads.”  The insult was muttered under his breath, but the young student still heard it.

Eggsy smirked and snorted.  It was intriguing to listen to Harry’s opinion on other students’ work.  He himself had spent a fair few of his nights back in his earlier years writing up essays he’d put off—still does, he just doesn’t do that in Potions, Transfiguration and of course, Defence Against the Dark Arts.  Harry would give him a kick in the arse if he turned in something a first year could have written! That had happened with the first essay he’d ever turned into Harry, and it had been the last time he’d done it too.  Harry had made him rewrite the essay--a tedious effort to such a demand.  But there had been a positive outcome out of the extra work their sessions.

Roxy had also been miffed for his lack of concern for his grades.  He could roll the girl’s words off easily enough, but later that night, he realized just how much weight Harry’s words had to them.  Even though his professor offered him help, the obvious tone of disappointment had curled something cold inside of him and he never wanted to feel it again.  He wanted to make Harry proud.

“Insulting students, Prof?” Eggsy tutted with a smug smirk.  “Bet tha’ student tried ‘is best.”

Harry, without taking his eyes of the roll of parchment, responded in probably one of the most deadpanned voices he’d ever heard from the wizard.  “Is that what you would make yourself think when you copied Miss. Morton’s essays?”

“Oi, that was one time.”  Then there was the time where he _did_ copy from the textbook.  That had been four years ago though, how the bloody hell did Harry remember all of this!?

“Mm, and yet I still remember you tried to pass it off to be just a coincidence.”  Harry looked up this time, giving Eggsy one of his soft, gentle smiles.  He looked so relaxed in his office.  He still looked professional in his robes, jacket neatly folded over his chair. He still wore his charcoal waistcoat.  His white shirt was un-rumpled, though his tie hung a little loose around his neck and he undid the two top buttons of his collar.  It was the most relaxed Harry would get during school hours.

Eggsy thinned his lips and narrowed his eyes.  There was no heat behind the gaze.  It had taken awhile for Harry to realize Eggsy’s expression was more of a joke than him actually sulking.  He now just ignored the young wizard when he gave him this look.

“We’re brin’ up old shit now, yeah?”  It probably wasn’t the best idea to cuss around Harry, he was still a professor after all, but during these private times, Eggsy couldn’t help but feel at ease around Harry.  It wasn’t anything like hanging out with Roxy; here he was walking a delicate line.  The ex-Auror was just comfortable to be around.  

Harry either felt the same way or looked at this conversation as something separate from school.  He only chastised Eggsy’s cheek when he heard it in the halls or during classes.  Any time after that, well, he just allowed it.

“No, I just like to remember where you stood not too long ago.  You had no ambition for school or what you would do _if_ you graduated.”  Harry emphasized the key word Eggsy remembered saying to Harry when he was first pulled into the professor’s office.  Yes, it was years ago, but he remembered what he confessed to Harry.  You don’t forget the feeling of never being good enough to achieve anything.  “Now, here we sit, you in your last year, showing great promise at accomplishing what you thought you couldn’t.  You’re top of the class, and that is by no means by my doing.  You reached this level all on your own.”

Eggsy could feel his heart thud loudly in his chest.  He was almost sure that Harry could hear it too.  Even though he had long since taken his robe off and untucked his shirt, rolling up the sleeves to his elbows, he felt flustered.  All his hard work had been just to make Harry proud.  Sure his mum was happy too, but she had to be.  He could have failed his O.W.L.s and she would have been just as proud had he passed his exams.

When it came to Harry, it was a different thing altogether.  He wanted to see Harry beam at him with such pride.  He wanted to hear that he made the wizard proud with how hard he’d worked.  Roxy may have said similar words before, but to Eggsy, Harry’s were the only ones that truly had any weight to them.

“You’re jus’ sayin’ that.”  Eggsy stood up and placed his hands on the edge of the desk.  

Harry raised an eyebrow—quill still in his hand—and stared at Eggsy for a long moment before turning back to his grading.  He didn’t say anything and that confused the young wizard.

“Don’ want me givin’ up so close, yeah?”  He continued to push.  He was now leaning over the polished wood, not too close to Harry, but close enough to let some thoughts wander.  It would take much more moving before he’d be in the professor’s personal space.  Close enough to…

Harry glanced up at him from above his glasses and made a ‘tut’ noise.  “Eggsy, standing like that is how you ruin your posture.”  

Harry’s response wasn’t the one Eggsy was looking for.  He was hoping for something from his previous comment.  He didn’t pull back, but instead, he leaned a bit forward just to spite the older wizard.  He liked pushing the man’s limits.

Harry ignored him for several minutes before the young wizard gave up and huffed, slumping back in his seat.  Posture be damned.

He reached for his open collar and pulled at the bronze chain wrapped around his neck.  It was a quirk; something he did when he was nervous or bored.  Usually, he caught himself before doing it around others.  His school uniform usually hid the chain, which hid the medal hanging against his chest.

In the heavy silence, Eggsy took the time to look around the room he’s studied a million times.  Seriously, he probably knew the room in greater detail than he did his fucking potions textbook.  There were several newspapers hanging up on the wall.  Many of the headlines were ridiculous.  It was back in fifth year, just before they broke for Christmas break when Harry finally gave in and answered most of his questions about the headlines.

He knew that these weren’t all of them.  They were only the ones he was most fond of.  The others were home in his office.  Eggsy had thought many times, about how he would enjoy getting to see those.  He wanted to ask questions about some articles he vaguely remembered seeing back when he started attending Hogwarts but had no idea that it was Harry Hart behind everything.

He gave the stories behind some, how they were all headlines that appeared about some of his more significant missions as an Auror.  There were several where Harry even had a brief mention on the front page.

Eggsy could remember Harry’s words about how a gentleman’s name should only appear in the paper three times, however,  being an Auror, that made that rule hard to follow.  He asked Merlin several times to omit his name from any work he was associated with.  Usually, the head of the department listened.  Of course, there were times where, well he didn’t.  

The one article above Harry’s chair was a large picture of the ex-auror, looking extremely unamused and Merlin smiling smugly in the background.  The article read, “Great Day for the Ministry.”  That had been when Harry infiltrated a group of undercover wizards working in the Department of Magical Education.  They had certain views on how students should be taught and thought their view needed to be heard.

When Eggsy asked about that one, Harry nearly rolled his eyes.  Harry still remembered Merlin’s words when he stormed into his office the day the article went out.

“Sorry, Harry.  It’s been a slow week.”  The cheeky bastard had seemed all too pleased with himself as he leaned back in his chair and smiled up at his best Auror.

Harry was a private man, and Eggsy couldn’t help but feel like he was a special exception.  Even in the few years since Harry started teaching, Harry never mentioned meeting with other classmates than just to assist them on their homework.

“You are exceptionally bright, Eggsy,” Harry spoke after a long stretch of silence, breaking his student’s little fantasy.  His voice sounded a touch louder than usual, breaking the silence between them.  “when you put your mind to it.” he added.  “Truth is, you are lazy.”  

First a compliment and now an insult.  What was Harry playing at?  Eggsy frowned, dropping his hand from his neck to his thigh, clenching the fabric of his trousers.

“You don’t put forth the effort I know you are more than capable of.”  Harry’s bright brown eyes were piercing his.  Even through the glasses and low light in the room, the professor’s gaze was intense.  His mouth was set in a frown; head a slight tilt to the right.  “You do well enough in school, but if you pushed yourself, even more, I know you just may surprise yourself.”

“Wha’?” was Eggsy’s brilliant reply.  He stared at Harry with a slightly scrutinizing air.  Is sounded like a compliment, but Eggsy could read between the lines.  Harry was telling him to smarten up.  “’M doing jus’ fine.”

“Yes, I know, having given the grades out myself.  I know where all your classmates stand.”  Harry placed his quill down finally and collected the stack of parchment on his desk.

“Then wot are you sayin’?”  One thing Eggsy had to work on, and he knew it, was the chip he carried around on his shoulder.  Harry may have encouraged him and praised him, but he was always trying to read into the words.  Even when there wasn’t an ulterior motive to his words, Eggsy tried to find one.  He’d gotten better, but it was hard to shake a habit.

The older wizard sighed heavily like he was irritated.  “I am only giving my opinion.  I have witnessed your success as a student and only wish that as your last year comes to a close, you are prepared for what will be coming outside of school.”

Harry straightened his tie and grabbed his jacket.  It was almost time for supper.  He fastened the button around his middle and walked around his desk.

“Eggsy, you really must take that chip off your shoulder.  I only want you to do well.  Have you known me to undermine you?”  Harry looked at Eggsy with such sincerity that the young wizard hung his head.

“’M sorry.”  He was a little embarrassed; he felt guilty.  He knew Harry wasn’t one judgment without carefully constructing his opinion.  Professor Hart was a logical man.  He didn’t earn his reputation for nothing.

“You must let it go, Eggsy.”  He clasped his hand on the boy’s tense shoulder, feeling it relax immediately.  “I think it’s best if we end here.  You will be wanted in the Great Hall soon.  I assume Miss. Morton is wondering where you’ve been.”  

The older wizard smirked and opened the door for his student.  “I do apologize for keeping you.  Time does seem to fly when…”

“You’re havin’ fun?”  Eggsy smirked cheekily and raised his eyebrows.

Harry took a minute as if he were thinking.  “I do enjoy our chats very much, Eggsy.”

Again, a rush of excitement washed through Eggsy.  He could have watched Harry mark without one word exchanged between them and it would have been some of the best two hours he’d ever spent.

“I’ll see you at dinner.”  

Eggsy took that as his dismissal and began to descend the stairs from the office.  He walked down the aisle between a row of desks and left the room without looking back.  He’d see Harry in less than an hour.  He didn’t need to look back.

*****

“Eggsy, what the fuck are you doing?”  Roxy scowled at the wizard currently trying to shove a rather large handful of Every Flavoured Beans into his mouth.  Considering how many of those things he had in his hand, the flavour was going to be ghastly.

Eggsy’s face pinched in disgust when he managed to fit a fair majority into his mouth.  He didn’t gag, but his nose wrinkled and his eyes squinted.

“Ugh.  That was disgusting.”  He managed to swallow, lifting up the opened box of his remaining candy, glaring at it.

“Well, eating all those at once certainly wasn’t your most brilliant idea.  These things are vile on their own.”  Roxy reached out and grabbed the box from the boy.  She fingered around the colourful beans, pulling out a purple on.  Please be grape!  

Sugared Violet.  Okay, that was luck.  She handed the box back to Eggsy.  It was Saturday, and with the day free of classes and homework, she and Eggsy were just wandering the school grounds.  She had suggested the library, but Eggsy complained that if he didn’t have exams to study for or a paper to write, he wasn’t spending his time in that book infested room.

“Never said I thought it through.”  He picked out another bean and popped it into his mouth.  

“But if you continue eating, you’ll be ill by tonight.”  

Tonight was the Hallowe’en feast, which really was just an excuse for the students to eat all the sweets they could before bed.  Eggsy has more than once eaten well over his fair share of sugar, to the point where he almost landed himself in the infirmary.  Those weren’t his best moments, and Roxy had had no sympathy for him for his daft idea to try to eat his weight in gummy slugs.  

He liked a challenge.  Was that so wrong?

They walked out to the courtyard.  It was a lovely autumn day.  Too warm for gloves and scarfs, but cool enough for a light jacket to be needed.  They had barely stepped onto the stone pathway when someone called out.

“We wouldn’t want you to miss the feast,” a sour voice sneered.  “However, any more sugar and you’ll start looking like the other end of a garden gnome,” Charlie chuckled from under a tree.  He had Rufus and Hugo with him, as well as a sour looking girl and two sixth year boys who looked like they’d taken one too many quaffles to their faces.  “Professor Hart won’t like you if you look-”

“Get bent, Charlie,” Eggsy growled out, cutting the boy off.  He was used to the Slytherin's very generic insults.  Having a muggle for a mum put a target on his back, but the fact that his dad was a “failure” as far as Aurors come, Charlie never let him forget it.  It didn’t help that this particular Slytherin’s dad was essentially just below the Minister, (Eggsy’s words. His dad was really just head of some big department, but acted like he owned the place) so they all knew the tragic story of Lee Unwin.

Each week Charlie and his lackeys tried to challenge themselves by coming up with extremely unoriginal insults.  There were the ones of him sleeping his way through school, living with the centaurs, and his personal favourite: the one time Harry introduced the Flobberworm to which Charlie shouted: “looks like Eggsy!”  

“What’s the matter, Unwin?  Not in the mood for some fun?"  

Eggsy stopped, back towards Charlie and his gang.  He swayed, turning his body slightly.  Roxy noticed and reached for his arm.  Her face was set in a deep frown, and a warning gaze.  

He ignored her and strode towards the group of Slytherins.

“Well, boys, looks like we got ourselves a challenger.”  The tall brunette smirked and crossed his arms.  He stood a few inches taller than Eggsy, which didn't matter at all since he could fight despite the slight height difference.

Eggsy returned the mocking smile, narrowing his eyes.  “I told ya, fuck off.  This shit ain't funny and it’s getting old.”

The Slytherin's smile dropped and his glare turned threatening.  “You think you’re so tough. Throw around some words and a few threats and you think you actually scare us.  You’re just some scum who got lucky because daddy had magic.  A lot of good that did for you.  We all know the only reason you haven’t flunked out is because Professor Hart has some deal with Professor Valentine.  Doesn’t want his precious little protégée falling on his ass.”

Eggsy clenched his hand into a fist.  He was used to the ridicule from students.  He was used to the Slytherins voicing their opinions, what he couldn't stand was when Charlie brought up his family.  That was crossing the line.  He didn't know shit about his family.  Charlie though just because he was pure-blood, anyone less was just a bug beneath his foot.

“We all know you don’t belong here.”  

"The fuck you got to say about my family?  You don' know nothin'-"

This time Eggsy took a step forward but was held back.  Roxy had stepped in front of him, pushing her hand against his chest.  She looked pissed, but Eggsy wasn’t sure if it was directed at him or Charlie.  

“Stop,” she warned sharply.  She only talked to Eggsy liked that when she knew he was going to do something that would only lead to a bigger conflict.  She knew the wizard could handle himself.  She’s seen him fight a couple of times, but this was Charlie Hesketh.  One wrong move with him and Eggsy would find himself out of school before the day was up.  “Calm down.”

He looked down at the witch, knowing she had his best interests in mind, but was seriously considering brushing her aside just so he could finally take a swing at Charlie.  For the past seven years, he’d laid down and took the other wizard’s beating.  Maybe it’s time he finally stopped being the better person.  He wouldn’t hit the boy too hard, just enough to leave a nice shiner.

“Good idea, Eggsy.  Listen to your girlfriend.  She’s the smart one.  Seeing as she ties your shoes.”

This time Eggsy made a lunge for Charlie.  He was fine with taking the taunting, but he couldn’t stand when he brought Roxy into the middle of their shit.  This was never her fight.

“Fuck off, Charlie!” she growled once she’d managed to push Eggsy several steps back—she was surprisingly strong for her size.  “Speak again and I will let Eggsy have a turn with you.”

Charlie’s friends all cackled in the background, seeing something funny with this situation that was lost on Eggsy and Roxy.

“Fine then.  Just because I have somewhere to be, I’m going to drop it.  Just be careful, Unwin, next time you may not have your guard dog to protect you.”

Eggsy sneered and watched as the brunet walked off, laughing like what he had just said was the funniest thing ever.  Rufus and Hugo followed him like two starving dogs after a slab of meat.

Eggsy was tempted to reach for his wand.  He had a perfect opportunity.  A simple flick of his wand and he would send the fucking bastard flying down that hall.  He’d be breaking about half a dozen school rules though.

“Eggsy,” Roxy gritted out, seeing the familiar focus look in Eggsy’s eyes when he intended to follow through on an idea.  It was going to be bad seeing as it was set on Charlie.  “No.  He’s not worth getting detention over.  You bloody well know he’ll go crying to Professor King over this.”

She was right.  He would at best, get a month’s detention for hexing Charlie.  While seeing the stupid look on the ugly twat’s face would be worth it, spending a month doing Professor King bidding was not worth a few seconds of triumph.  

“He’s vile, but I didn’t just throw myself between you two just so you could get sent to Headmaster Valentine.”

“Relax, Rox.  I wasn’ goin' to do anythin' here.  If I was gonna stun 'im, I’d do it without so many people around.  But jus’ once, I wan' to see that prick fall flat on his arse.  Rather a good punch in his face, but magic leaves less blood.  Charlie’s too much of a coward to fight with fists.  Wouldn’ stand a chance against me.”  

He smiled smugly at that.  Even after he found out he was a wizard, life during summer didn’t get much better.  He couldn’t exactly tell the blokes who threatened to beat him up that he was a wizard.  Even though he could easily take them out with a simple stunning spell, he heard rumours about trials for underage wizards performing magic outside of school.  As tempting as taking out his wand was, he wasn’t going to put his mum through that shit.  Learning how to throw a punch was the only way to make sure he didn’t get punched out in the back of an alley.

He had gained quite a reputation—not a good one, but it didn’t matter, by this time next year.  He’d be on his way to becoming an Auror and leaving that shitty neighbourhood he had called home for so long.

Plus, he’s already gotten too many detentions in his past years.  Harry would not be pleased if he were to fall back into his old habits for something so petulant as hexing another student.

“I really hope you don’t intend to follow through on that threat, Mr. Unwin,” a voice spoke calmly behind the two students.

“Jesus!” Eggsy nearly cried and whipped around so fast he almost tripped over his feet.  He came to face Harry Hart.  A light, almost amused smile was on the professor’s face.  He wasn’t in trouble, but how the fuck did Harry find them all the way down here?  There was no reason for Harry to be in the quad today.  Well, he was a teacher, he was technically allowed anywhere in the castle.

Roxy smirked a little before schooling her face.  She felt a little sorry that Harry had heard Eggsy’s threat.  It wasn’t the first time that the boy’s language has got him into trouble.  Cussing out a teacher or a student with others around wasn’t the best idea when most teachers didn’t particularly favour you.

“Don’ sneak up on a bloke like that, prof.  Nearly stopped my heart, right there.”

“My apologies.”  Harry’s smile grew just slightly.  “I shall make my presence more clear in the future.”  His hands were clasped behind his back.  He was in a dark blue suit today and Eggsy couldn’t help but let his eyes wander, taking in how well the suit fit him.  He caught himself just before he passed Harry’s waist.  That would have been embarrassing had Harry noticed.  

Harry arched an eyebrow but didn’t comment.  If he noticed, he didn’t give it away, saving Eggsy his dignity.  

“S’not like you scared me.”  Roxy rolled her eyes and nudged him in the ribs.  “Jus’ wasn’t expectin' you.  Don’ you teachers ‘ave lessons and shit to plan?  Tha’s what you do on your days off: find new ways to make our lives hell?”  Eggsy gave his usual crooked smirk, but there was a subtle difference to it.  While Harry may be oblivious to the change, Roxy caught it the second she glanced at the younger wizard.

While his smirk usually oozed false confidence and arrogance, this one was much softer.  His eyes weren’t hard or presenting a challenge.  They shone brightly and held warmth.  It was a very small change, and only noticeable if one knew Eggsy like Roxy did, but it was there nevertheless.

Harry chuckled—he actually chuckled.  “While I admire your… ingenuity, we as teachers do need time to ourselves.  It’s our only purpose isn’t to ‘make your lives hell’.”  

The older wizard returned the smile.  Instead of chastising the boy for his language—most teachers didn’t appreciate such language used in their presences—Harry decided to not bring it to the centre of their conversation.  This wasn’t the first time Eggsy has used a bold choice of vocabulary and it wouldn’t be the last.

“Wha?  Don’ tell me you got tired of gradin’ papers.  You practically live in that room.”  He would know because if you needed to find Harry, you had a near perfect chance of finding him in his office.  He would have been sure the ex-Auror slept at his desk if it hadn’t been for that time where Eggsy caught Harry heading to his room.  He had been out past curfew, but that was an entirely different story. Harry had just been leaving the classroom, citing his need for some rest.

“A change of scenery is needed to ensure a man does not go mad looking at the same four wall each day.”

Jesus Christ.  This was fucking painful.  Roxy was standing silently by Eggsy, forgotten by the two wizards.  Eggsy was flirting with Harry and she was sure their professor knew.  It was subtle, but she knew Harry was observant enough to at least see the way Eggsy’s tone had taken on a light and teasing quality.  She was sure Harry understood the concept of flirting. He wasn't that old, and he was a decent looking bloke.  Eggsy couldn't be the only student hiding a crush. However, he was probably the one sailing the biggest ship.  

She didn’t know if she was meant to say anything.  Eggsy seemed to be enjoying the attention, letting down his guard to openly joke with their professor.  And what was the harm, really?  As far as she knew, Eggsy said he wasn’t going to try anything.  He wouldn’t jeopardize his education.  And if he had done something, he would have told her.  Her friend was impulsive, but he wasn’t dumb enough to try something at school.  And Harry was much too professional to risk the reputation of his job and to put the welfare of one of his students at risk.

“So you thought the courtyard was good ‘scenery’?”  Eggsy tipped his head to the side, looking up a Harry.  It was a cloudy day, but the sun was making occasional appearances.  The sun streamed down at that moment, reflecting on Harry’s hair, emphasizing the lighter brown tones and the specs of grey.  To Eggsy, that just made the man more appealing.  It may have been an obvious sign of the man’s age, but it also made him realize that Harry was much more experienced than he was.  A wizard his age knew twice as much as he did.  Had done twice as much as he’s done.  The fact that he had been an Auror also meant that he’s experienced things most witches and wizards never would experience.

“I was actually just taking a walk around the grounds.  I only stopped when I heard your little...quarrel with Mr. Hesketh.  I was about to step in when Miss. Morton did so.”  Harry looked down at him with a pointed look.

“S'not like he didn' deserve it.  Sayin’ shit about my dad.”  Had Eggsy been looking at his professor and not the corridor Charlie and his gang had disappeared down, he would have noticed the man's jaw visibly tighten at the mention of his dad.  “Been given' me a hard time since first year.”

It's not like Harry didn't know any of this.  The issue with Charlie had come up a few times during their conversations.  Harry always encouraged him to react in a way Charlie wouldn't expect.  'Don't send the little shit sailing' is what Eggsy had translated it too.  He wouldn't for now for Harry's sake, but as soon as graduation came, and Charlie decided to start shit, nothing was going to stop him from hexing the wanker into another dimension.

“And you have shown you are the better student.  Mr. Hesketh is insufferable at times, and probably could do with a lesson in manners, but in the proper way.  Use your wand wisely."

Well shit, that didn’t suddenly give Eggsy about a hundred new fantasies for nighttime.

“Yes, sir.”  Because he had to be defiant somehow—never could just give in easily—he gave a mock salute.

The older wizard pressed his mouth into a hard line.  Neither student was sure if he was unimpressed by Eggsy's antics or hiding his amusement.

“I’ll see you later, Eggsy.  Miss. Morton.  And try not to ruin your appetite.”  His eyes glanced down to the striped box in his hand.  “It would unfortunate for you to miss the feast because you were too ill from mixing the wrong flavours together.

The younger wizard's mouth dropped as Harry smiled victoriously and walked off.

Did-did Harry—was he actually around during his little experiment?  He said he caught the end of his almost duel with Charlie, but that shit with the beans happened way before that.

“Did I miss somethin’?”  Eggsy glanced at Roxy.  “Was tha' a joke or somethin'?”

Roxy shrugged and looked over her shoulder.  “Coincidence?  I saw him the moment you did.  You're thinking too much.  Careful, I wouldn’t want you to pull something.”  She reached up and tapped the side of his head.

“Oh, sod off.”  He swatted her head away.  Unlike earlier, there wasn't a threat behind his words.  “’M jus' saying.”

“Please, you love me and would be lost without me.  Who else would tell you to stop fucking about?”

That was true, but he wasn’t about to admit that.  He worked hard too, thank you very much.  Roxy just did most of the… Heavy lifting.  Okay, if it weren’t for Roxy he’d never have gotten through first and second year with the grades he did.  Roxy was his best mate, his sister in another sense.

They spent the rest of the day floating around the Castle.  They actually had several conversations with the ghosts, most of whom thought this day had lost all significance.  Several didn’t agree with the new traditions, especially the muggle ones.  

Eggsy who grew up with both traditions, kind of felt the ghosts were just disgruntled that they couldn’t enjoy the new traditions because they were so stuck in their times.  Well, they all refused to crossover; can’t exactly get mad over the new festivities.  

“I’m just saying, telling a ghost to ‘adapt’ isn’t the best thing to say if you don’t want the bloody man to go through you.”

Yeah, and telling Nearly Headless Nick that joining the Headless Hunt was “neva gonna happen’” probably wasn’t the best idea.  The ghost ended up storming off—or floating off right through Eggsy.  That was a feeling he’d experienced before and would like to never feel again.

“Wha'?  I was jus' tellin’ the truth.  It ain’t gonna happen.  He has ‘is head still.  Don’ that kind of defeat the purpose of being headless?”

Roxy rolled her eyes and shook her head, blonde hair swishing from her ponytail.  

“It’s not about being right, Eggsy.  You have to be a little more sensitive.  You know his death is still a sore spot.”

“Been more than five hundred years, ya think he’d gotten over it.”

“And this is what I mean.”  She sighed and stopped in the doorway for the Great Hall.  The room had transformed for the evening of festivities.  Jack-o-lanterns floated all over the room.  The ceiling was still bewitched to the night sky just with some clouds and a full moon for effect.  How appropriate, Eggsy thought.

Most of the house tables were filled.  He and Roxy were a little late after their run in with Nick (as Eggsy liked to call him, much to the ghost’s annoyance).  The place settings were all laid out, but the feast had yet to start, waiting for the Headmaster to declare the beginning of the celebration.  Professor Valentine was sat in his big posh chair right in the centre of the staff table.  On his right was Professor King and right next to him was Harry.  

Smaller groups of students filtered in, walking around Eggsy and Roxy who still stood at the door.  Roxy was looking around for her mates from her house while Eggsy was fixated on the staff table.

“I’m going to find my seat.  You should probably do the same,” the witch announced as soon as she found a group of Ravenclaws waving her over.  One thing that sucked about this feast, they still had to sit at their house table.

The room was mostly filled now, Eggsy noticed once he tore his eyes away from Harry, who’d never once looked in his direction.  Pity.

“Yeah.  Suppose you’re righ'.  Catcha later, Rox?”  

“Probably; you know where to find me.”  She winked over her shoulder and hurried over to join her table.  Eggsy headed for his, finding Ryan and Jamal in the middle of the table.  Luckily, they saved a seat for him.

“Where you been?” Ryan asked the second their mate sat down.  He was supposed to meet up with them a lot earlier so they could get seats together, but the run in with Nick had held him up.

“Pissing off ghosts,” was his snarky reply.

“Didn’ let one go through you again, did ya?”  Jamal smirked, already knowing the answer.

Okay, so maybe it happened more than he cared to admit.  It was more than twice, but no more than ten.

“Oh, shove off.”  He reached for a glass of pumpkin juice, drinking half of it in one go.  His mates laughed and Eggsy found himself smiling as well.  It was going to be a good night.  This wasn’t one of the most anticipated celebrations of the year for nothing.

*****

It was well into the night when Eggsy stood under the warm spray of the shower.  Most of his dorm mates were starting to settle for bed or working on their homework.

Classes today had been boring, well, save for one in particular.  It really had been a boring class; just reviewing the chapter in their text, but Eggsy had been easily entertained solely by the sound of Harry’s deep, smooth voice.  Seriously, he could sit through a whole year of Divination classes if Harry were the teacher.

The way he read over the information, continuously throughout the whole class—only stopping to ask students various questions—showed that this was a practiced skill.  When he entered class, the students listened.  They respected him.

“Very good, Eggsy,” Harry had said to him when he correctly answered one of the questions, and then again after he actually volunteered to give an answer, something that Eggsy never did for any of his other classes.  But for Harry, he wanted to make an effort.

Charlie made a snide comment at the end of class about Harry showing favouritism because he pitied the poor.  He had been ten seconds away from hexing the wanker six ways to next week when Harry called him to his desk, stopping him.  Once again, Harry had interfered in his attempt to make Charlie pay for all his shit.

It's been a steady thing since fourth year, and half of the time he wasn’t even sure how Harry had found them. Once outside the library, an instance near the lake and that other time in the hallway outside of the potions classroom.  Halloween.  If he didn’t know any better, he’d swear the professor was stalking him or had a tracker on him.  How did would someone ever spy in this school?

Harry had reminded him that, yes, Charlie was a douche (Eggsy’s words), but he must be the better man—must not resort to Charlie’s behaviour.  He had then placed his hand on Eggsy’s shoulder.

The way that familiar weight had felt, it caused a shiver that ran up the young wizard’s spine and made his stomach tighten.  Harry’s hands were always so strong and firm.  They demonstrated control and power, and dominance.  The thoughts spurred something in Eggsy’s gut, and his cock twitched with interest.

Usually, he willed away thoughts like these when he was in the dorm showers.  While he was comfortable with the fact that someone was normally showering next to him, having a wank with Jamal or Ryan right next to him was a line he would never cross. However, seeing as he was alone tonight...

He ran a hand down his chest, running through the trails of water that streaked over him.  His finger brushed over his length, which stiffened under the touch.  

He let two fingers ghost up and down his dick, teasing before he took himself in his hand. His grip was loose.

Touching himself to Harry certainly wasn’t something new. In the shower when he was alone, which, conveniently was now.  And it’s been a while…

He wrapped his hand loosely around his length, keeping the first few strokes soft and teasing, enough to get him in the mood.

He let out a shallow breath when his cock curled up, hard and waiting for release.

His eyes fluttered shut, gasping as he slid his hand up, brushing a thumb over the head.

It always helped him to think of himself anywhere but the gents’ showers, and he had a particular fantasy he liked playing out in his head.

He’s in a private shower, it was big but only meant for one, like the ones in the teacher’s private quarters.

It was late in the night, sometime during the summer though.  He knew he was waiting for something—someone.

He moved his hand down, tightening around the head, hissing.  His other hand goes to his chest, rubbing a thumb over his left nipple, pulling at the rosy bud.

"Fuck," he groaned, barely stopping his head from colliding with the wet tiles.  It really has been too long since he had gotten a moment alone.  Sharing a room with four other blokes didn’t exactly present much time for ‘private’ moments.

A much larger, warmer hand soon covered his wrapping itself around his hold.  Harry’s hand fitted over his with ease, guiding the firm tugs.  His other hand grabbed Eggsy's hip, pulling him back.

Eggsy groaned at the thought of his back pressed against the firmness of Harry's chest, his backside rubbing against Harry's hard, thick length.

God, Harry's cock.  That was something he let his imagination run a tad bit wild over.

Harry moved his hand, squeezing the base of his dick, eliciting a whimper from the younger wizard.

"Shh, Eggsy," Harry whispered.  “I’ve got you.”

He gasped, stroking himself faster, building the fire in his stomach with each movement of his hand.  Harry’s hand moved up and down his back, squeezing his ass as his other hand inched Eggsy closer to his release.

The sound of Harry’s gruff voice praising and encouraging him was enough to make him come on the spot.  His cock twitched in his hand, dripping beads of precome and water down his fist.

“H-Harry,” the younger wizard groaned, squeezing his eye shut as he dropped his head back on his professor’s shoulder.  His left hand moved to take Harry’s and his right was reaching around to the back of Harry’s head, lacing his fingers in his drenched locks.  “P-please.”

He was close.  The pleasure was building.  He could only moan and gasp as Harry tightened his grip, holding him like a vice and it was all too much.

“It’s all right, darling,” Harry cooed.  “Let go for me.  Show me how beautiful you are when you come.”  And that was all it took to send the boy over the edge.  With a low groan of Harry’s name, the young man came, spilling himself over his hand, and onto the soaked shower floor.

Harry’s hand continued to pump him, letting him ride out his orgasm, while whispering praises as Eggsy panted, trying to steady his breath.

It took a long moment for him to regain control of his body.  He was slumped against the wall, barely keeping himself from sliding down to the floor.  The water was still warm, shielding him from the chilly air, but he still felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over his head.

It was always a sinking feeling, his return to reality, when he realized he was alone and not in the private shower, sleeping quarters, classroom, or that one time in the train compartment.  No, he always ended up in the shower or his small four-post bed: alone.

While he never felt ashamed—it wasn’t like he did anything wrong, his fantasies were his own and Harry didn’t know—he didn’t feel empty or dirty that he had an amazing orgasm, but was left alone as the high faded.  

Slowly, he straightened up and turned the water off.  He reached out of the little stall and grabbed his towel, drying his face before wrapping it around his waist.  

One good thing about beating one off in the shower was that there's no awkward cleanup.  He grabbed his clothes from the shelf outside the shower and changed into his t-shirt and flannel bottoms.

His dorm mates were all asleep by the time he returned to the room.  The dorm was dark, but the moon illuminated the small sleeping quarters enough for Eggsy to find his way to bed.  

He hung his towel over the wooden chair by his bed and kicked off his slippers, nudging them under the bed.  

He pulled his quilt back and climbed in.  His hair was still wet, which meant it would be next to untameable in the morning.  Oh well, it’s not like he bothered trying to style it anyway.  He liked the dishevelled look.  He would sometimes imagine Harry combing his fingers through his hair, trying to tame the mess into a neatly combed style like the ex-Auror always wore.

All this was harmless though.  They were fantasies; they were in his head.  He knew that they had no chance of coming true.  As sad as that reality was, the fact still remained that he was a student and Harry was his professor.  He wasn’t always a rule follower—he preferred to bend them or test limits—but this was one line he would not cross.  He wasn’t daft enough to do something as pathetic as confessing his feelings for his professor.  No, he knew where he stood on that matter.  Roxy would kick his arse if he did.


	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support I've gotten so far. 
> 
> Here is part two. All I will say is: I'm sorry.

It was two days ‘til Christmas, and while the halls of Hogwarts were less crowded and quieter, the excitement was still present around the castle.  Roxy was practically bubbling with excitement, having decided to stay behind when she heard Eggsy wasn't going home.  He didn’t share why exactly, but she figured it had something to do with his mum’s new boyfriend.

‘Slick git’ was what the boy grumbled when he mentioned Dean, and the sour look on his face was enough for Roxy to understand that this was a matter they weren’t going to cross.

With more than half the school gone, Roxy and Eggsy were free to sit together during breakfast and feasts.  It was a nice change from the assigned tables and rules they were forced to follow during regular school days.

Eggsy would be lying if he said he didn’t miss home.  He did.  He felt awful for staying at school instead of visiting his mum, but at the same time, he knew he was partially unwanted there.  Having Roxy around helped, and it was a nice surprise when he found out that Harry was staying as well.

In the past couple of months, his feelings for the professor hadn’t diminished in the slightest.  He still felt a rush of heat spread through him each time Harry greeted him in the hallways, and his heart rate always seemed to rise when Professor Hart gave him that small, yet proud, smile when he got an answer right.  They continued their weekly after class sessions and Eggsy had to fight everything in him not to grin like a lunatic as soon as he stepped foot into Harry’s office.

Roxy teased him that he had it bad, but it was worse that he couldn’t even deny it anymore.  He knew his feelings for Professor Hart surpassed just a simple crush, but he wasn’t quite sure what that emotion was.  He didn’t share this revelation with Roxy, but he was sure she knew.  She always knew.

It was going close to eight when he made it back to his dorm.  The room was empty, all beds made except for his.  Ryan and Jamal had left for the train yesterday and so did Tristian and Sam.  He’d have the room to himself for the next two weeks.

He could do whatever he wanted, within reason.  He was still at school and unfortunately still had to follow some rules.

Supper had ended just an hour ago, and he’d said goodnight to Roxy who had abandoned him to hang out with some of her Ravenclaw friends.  He got called dramatic when he used those exact words.

He really wasn’t bothered by it.  Usually, he had Ryan and Jamal to bother when Roxy went off with her other friends. However, now he was instead with the reclusive confines of his bed and curtain. 

Fuck, this was boring.  Christmas was almost here and he was stuck slouching around, trying to find some way to entertain himself.

He could get a head start on his reading for DADA for next semester.  That would probably impress Harry, but, reading.  Nope.  As much as he liked the class—and Harry—he wasn’t about to do schoolwork when he didn’t need to.

He could go for a walk around the castle.  Go outside.  There was snow and there was just something tranquil about the snow here.  It was as if the magic from the castle itself was casting down the sparkling flakes. 

If he did go outside, he’d need his cloak and scarf.  Another perk of the Christmas break, they didn’t need to wear their uniforms.  No stuffy wool, constricting ties or proper attire until term resumed.  Jeans, jumpers, and tracksuits were what Eggsy felt most comfortable in—coming from his upbringing—and finally getting the chance to get back into his favourite jacket was a holiday all on its own.  However, it would do nothing to protect him from the cold.

He crouched down and pulled his trunk from under his bed.  The black wood was faded and marked, having gotten it second hand.  His mum had thrown his dad’s out, so when the time came for him to attend Hogwarts, a used trunk was all they could find.  It hadn’t been in bad shape when they bought it—a little worn, but it still held up—it was the extra years of use and abuse that chipped away at the black and gold detail.

His initials were marked in gold on each end.  Amazingly, he had convinced his mum to get E.U. instead of G.U.

 He opened his trunk, which was a mess of clothes, books, and broken quills.  He really did need to clean the thing out, but after the holidays.  This was the time to relax.

He found his scarf and cloak, which was draped over several objects.  He pulled the black wool piece of fabric, knocking his Herbology textbook out of the trunk.  He grabbed to book, being careful with the beat up cover.  It was one bad tear from falling out.

He placed it back in his trunk, careful not to drop it on the gifts he was hiding.  There were three packages.  He’d sent his mum's off three days ago and gave his dorm mates theirs before they left.  They were all small things, but he was more protective of the third package—the one that shouldn’t be there.

There were two wrapped in silver paper with an ice blue silk ribbon on each—Roxy’s gifts, and one slim, smaller box with a black organdy ribbon tied neatly into a bow. 

Eggsy turned the slim charcoal coloured box in his hands.  He knew what is in it; he’s the one who had bought it with a certain intention in mind.  An intention that he knew he was not following through with, or so he thought.

Roxy wouldn’t get her gift until Christmas, but… Would it hurt to give Harry his?  He never officially planned on giving it to him, but call it Christmas spirit or barmy, he felt the need to see Harry’s face as he opened his present.

It wouldn’t hurt.  Would it?  It was just a small Christmas gift—two months’ worth of savings, but who needed to know such a minor detail.  Anyway, he did want to go for a walk…

*****

Eggsy stopped in front of the large, closed wood door.  He contemplated knocking, but he never made a habit of doing so, so why start now?  He knew Harry was in his room, he often stayed late.

Grabbing the handle, he pulled the door open and stepped in the empty and dimly lit room.  Lanterns lining each side of the room were glowing a soft golden light.  There were shadows around the desk, but not enough where Eggsy was walking blind. 

He saw the professor at his desk, not in his office like he expected.  He held a boring brown quill in his hands, writing something.  The quill was the standard most students used; nothing special.  He bit his lip, trying to hide the smirk at the thought of possibly changing that.

Would Harry use his gift?

Harry had yet to acknowledge him, so either he didn’t notice he was standing a couple of metres away or was deciding to ignore him.  Usually, it was the latter on the account for Eggsy’s lack of manners.  Harry always disapproved of his ‘street behaviour’, but never tried to change him… Too much.  This was Harry Hart: he liked getting his way.

“Still doin’ work?  Come on, Harry. It’s Christmas break,” Eggsy coolly broke his silence.

Harry remained focused on his letter but didn’t seem surprised by his current company.

“And I still have work to finish before I can enjoy myself, Eggsy.  However, seeing as I will not be making a trip back home-” Harry placed his quill in his ink pot and looked up at him “-I don’t see the point in letting my work pile up.”

“’S two days before Christmas.  'S time to relax and forget school work and shit.”  Eggsy leaned against the table directly across from Harry, crossing his legs and arms.

Harry chuckled at the young man’s enthusiasm.  In the time of being Eggsy’s teacher, he’d never once seen the boy leave for the holidays.  He always stayed around and could usually be seen with Miss. Morton.  His mother certainly missed him at this time.

“I have seen many Christmases, Eggsy.  I certainly can spare one to finish writing letters to some of my ‘mates’.”  He looked up in time to see Eggsy shake his head with an amused smirk.

Harry Hart always had a way of surprising him.

“While we are on this topic of how to spend the holiday, may I ask you a question?”

Eggsy raised a curious brow with a cheeky grin.  “Didn’ ya just do, sir?” 

He wasn’t the smartest student here, and he knew that, but he praised himself when he would (rarely) get one on Harry.

“I mean another one.”  Harry rolled his eyes, but he was still smiling fondly, a smile that made Eggsy heart flutter in his chest.

“Sure.”  Eggsy shrugged his shoulders.  It probably wasn’t that bad of a question.  Harry already knew so much about him.  It was probably just about why he was visiting him so late at night.

“For as long as I have known you, Eggsy, you’ve never made the trip home for Christmas.  Why?”

He hid his shock, ducking his head and shifting on his feet.  Well, that was new.  He never really thought Harry cared why he stayed at school during break.  Maybe Harry never really bought his excuses like; ‘just wanted time to myself’ or ‘mum's gone to visit some relatives. They’re all stuck up gits’ excuses. 

He’d mentioned Dean to Harry briefly; not too much detail, but enough to know it’s an off limit topic, but there was another reason he avoided going home for Christmas, and it was something he’d never mentioned to Harry.

Now was as best of a time as any.  The topic was open and he trusted Harry enough to not give him that pandering sympathy bullshit everyone would give him when they learned of his father’s death.

“Christmas was never a good time,” Eggsy replied honestly, taking a step towards Harry’s desk.  He reached out and rested his hand on the smooth wood.  “My dad died around this time.  Don’ really remember ‘im.”

This was the first time he’d talked about his dad’s death in great detail to anyone but Roxy.  It wasn’t a story he liked to go around sharing.

Lee Unwin had been new in the Auror field when a mission had gone horribly wrong, costing the man his life.  Eggsy still didn’t know the exact circumstances that led to his dad’s death.  His mum had been too distraught to ask for full details.  All he knew was, it hadn’t been the killing curse.  He didn’t know if that was reassuring or not.

Harry studied him for a moment. Eggsy missed the quick glance to the medal hanging around his next.  He still remembered when he gave it to the six-year-old wizard, the boy having no clue who he was or what he was doing. 

“Your father would be incredibly proud with all that you have accomplished.  He was an exceptional young Auror.  Showed great promise.”

Eggsy's head shot up with surprise.  “You worked with my dad?”  Well, it made sense—they both had been Aurors at the same time, but his dad had been an Auror for just over a year before he had died.  It was odd to think of his dad working with someone like Harry.  Not to speak ill of his father, but Harry had a reputation that was known.  He was _the_ Aurorof his time.

“Indeed, I did.  I worked several missions with him.”  He saw the young wizard eyes light up.  Eggsy walked around the desk and took a seat in the chair by his.  “I-I was there when he died.”  He swallowed hard and watched Eggsy carefully, preparing himself for any possible outburst.

Eggsy remained silent; a thousand thoughts flew through his mind.  Wow.  He wasn't sure what he expected when Harry told him he worked with his dad, but that thought was never one to have crossed his mind.  Did Harry see everything?  Did his dad really suffer?  Was Harry down and not able to help his dad?  Before he could ask a single question, Harry spoke again.

“I gave you that medal.”  The ex-Auror nodded to the bronze ‘M’.

“Y-you gave me—?”  He tentatively touched the circular metal, a medallion he’s never taken off.

“Your father saved my life, Eggsy.”  It was something he needed to let the boy know and the glee that washed over Eggsy’s face was worth it.

“My dad really saved your life?”  He couldn't help the sense of pride go through him at the thought that _his_ dad saved Harry Hart. 

“Yes, he did.”  Harry turned himself so he was facing his student; his right arm was resting on the armrest.

“So you know how it happened?”  Asking the real question was very tempting, but he didn’t want to know if his dad suffered.  His mum told him he hadn’t, but maybe that was said just to ease her grieving.

“I’d rather not go into too much detail, Eggsy, but please know, your dad was brave and died with honour.  He did not suffer.”

Eggsy looked a little skeptical.  It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Harry—he’d trust the man with his life—but he didn’t want him to spare his feelings.  “You’re not jus' sayin’ tha?”

“Eggsy-” the man looked slightly vexed “-have you ever known me to lie?”

“Righ’.”  The younger wizard pursed his lips and hung his head.  “Stupid question.”

There was a heavy sigh from his teacher and the sound of shuffling.  “I understand if this makes you look differently at me.”  That statement got Eggsy’s attention.  “I know that this isn’t exactly what—”

He didn’t blame Harry for his dad’s death if that’s what he thought.  He hated the wizards who had a hand in his father’s death.  Harry didn’t do anything wrong.  He’d never think ill of Harry.  Never.

“No.  Don’, Harry.  You’re brave too.  You was a great Auror and yes, my dad died, but I don’ blame you.  I’ve never blamed anyone but the wizard he was after.  S’not your fault.  You’re too loyal.”  Eggsy chuckled and bit his lip, trying to stop himself from smiling too wide.  “Tha’s why I love you.”

There was a long pause, well, it seemed long to Eggsy.  He was staring wide-eyed at his professor, mouth hanging open, trying in vain to reel back the words he spoke.

“Eggsy,” the man spoke in an eerily calm voice, and the young wizard didn’t like it.  “That’s very flattering, _but_ hardly realistic, is it?”  He met the boy's light eyes, clearly seeing the confusion in them.  Even he didn’t fully understand what he just said.

“S’true.”  The boy frowned, finally finding his voice.  “You’ve done so much for me, Harry.  You gave me a chance when-”

Harry held up his hand, halting the boy’s praises.  “Please do not use my name, Eggsy.  I am your professor and it’s undignified to be addressed as anything less.”

Ouch.  Okay, that stung.  It had been a slip of the tongue.  He’d gotten so used to calling Professor Hart ‘Harry’ in his head that he’d forgotten that this was an actual conversation.

“Sorry,” he mumbled half-heartedly.  “But ‘strue.  You was a brave Auror.  Still are a brave wizard.  You put up with me.  All the other teachers neva believed in me.  You did.  S’why I-”  He was going to say it again.  He said it once, and now it was too late to take it back.  He may as well damn himself completely instead of half-arsing it.

“Gary!” Harry snapped and something cold and fearful ran through Eggsy.  He cut off, staring at Harry with something just below fear.  He'd never heard Harry use his real name, not since the third year when he’d finally convinced Harry to call him ‘Eggsy’ like everyone else did.  He also never heard Harry raise his voice like he just did.

It was loud and commanding; probably what he used when he was in the middle of missions.  It was cold and held no remains of his once warm and gentle tone.  This was Harry Hart in the middle of a battle and it was terrifying to be on the receiving end.

“Enough.  While I appreciate your enthusiasm, this is highly inappropriate.  I am your teacher; therefore, you must respect my authority.  While I do care for you, Eggsy, the boundaries for teacher and student still have to be met.  You are crossing a line and I don’t appreciate your abuse of my fondness for you.  It’s embarrassing and highly wrong that you assume that there could be something between us.

“Righ’.”Eggsy gave a stiff nod, looking at Harry, but not meeting his eyes.  He couldn’t.  He couldn’t risk seeing the cold, pity and sympathetic look he knew he was going to find.  Anger that Eggsy has put him in this situation, and pity and sympathy for the seventeen-year-old wizard who thought what he was feeling was love.

He felt a lump form in his throat and he felt tears burn in the back of his eyes, but held them back.  He was not going to give Harry Hart the satisfaction of making him cry.  He was a lot stronger than most thought.  He wasn’t a Gryffindor, but that didn’t mean he was weak.

He stood up, feeling the urge to run.  He shoved his hands into his pockets, trying to ground him.  His left hand brushed over the box, which now sat heavy in his jacket.  All thoughts of giving Harry his gift were tainted.  He couldn’t give this now and expect a warm ‘thank you’ and appreciation.  If he gave this to Harry now, he’d probably get laughed at or worse, dismissed. 

Suddenly, the idea of ever buying Harry a gift seemed childish.  It was asinine to ever think he could give something like this to a professor who meant more to him than what was allowed. 

“I feel like it would be best for you to head back to your room.”  Harry was clearly done here, but Eggsy was not.  He was barely holding on; his heart already cracking with each passing second.

He knew he ought to listen to Harry, but he had to try one last time.  “Jus' though' it was-”

Harry looked at him, meeting his gaze.  Any sign of the Harry he knew was gone.  This wasn’t Harry Hart.  He bit his lip to hold in his shaky inhale, refusing to look away from the cold and distant stare.  He could have been hit with the killing curse and nothing would hurt as much as the look in Harry’s eyes.  For once, he saw hatred and betrayal.  He had violated Harry’s trust and ruined everything.

He waited for the final blow.

“I don’t want to hear it, Eggsy. Please respect my wishes and leave.  _Now_.”

‘Now’.  Harry had just said many hurtful words to him.  Just cut him open, but it was that one word that shattered him.  He let out a small choked off noise before he bit down on his cheek, hard.

He wanted to say something.  Tear into Harry like he’d just been cut up.  He wanted to yell and curse, but nothing came out.  He didn’t have the energy, and most importantly, he didn’t have the heart to say such hurtful things.  He wouldn’t lower himself down to Harry’s level.

“Yes, Professor.”  The words were barely a whisper.  Eggsy squared his shoulders and tipped his chin up.  He stood there for a second before turning on his heels and rushing out of the classroom.

*****

Each step Eggsy took felt heavy.  His shoes squeaked, echoing in the empty corridors.  It was a long and torturous walk back to the Hufflepuff basement.  Dinner had ended hours ago, so any remaining students were probably all in their dormitories, which was good; no one was around to see how he was barely keeping it together.

He felt the urge to find Roxy.  He needed someone, but at the same time, all he wanted was to be left alone.  He wouldn’t cry, not until he was alone.  Roxy was his best mate, but he wasn't even sure she could help with this fucked up situation.  This was something he couldn’t tell anybody. 

Harry’s words haunted his every step.  The large halls sound like they were whispering ‘ _enough_ ’, ‘ _leave_ ’, ‘ _now_ ’.  He couldn’t escape.

It felt like it took forever before he stepped into the safety of the Hufflepuff common room.  There were a couple of first years sitting on the couch and a second year at a desk, but none of them paid Eggsy any mind. 

He rushed to his room, thankful again that his dorm mates decided to head home this year.  He’d have been ashamed for anyone to see him like this.  How was he supposed to explain himself and talk his way out of this?

‘Sorry, just crying because I accidentally confessed my love for my professor only to be mocked and patronized’?  No; that wouldn’t work.

He slammed the door shut and stumbled over to his bed.  He pulled out the rectangular box, throwing it hard into his trunk.  He couldn’t throw it at the wall.  And as much as he wanted to burn the thing for existing, he spent too much money on it.

He stood helplessly in his room, looking for something to anchor himself.  His vision blurred, the tears refusing to stay back.  He hiccupped and dropped himself on his bed, still clothed. 

Stupid.  He was so fucking stupid that he would think Harry would return the affection.  Why didn’t he stop himself the first time and just try to laugh it off?  They could just pretend that nothing ever happened… Except it did.

He’d grown up around some real arseholes before.  Dean was easily the worst, and nothing anyone had ever said to him hurt as much as Harry’s words.  They cut him down to the core and left him to bleed out. 

Sobs wracked his body, shaking against his patchwork quilt.  He wished he had gone home.  Even though Dean would have been around, a shitty Christmas with his potential stepfather was suddenly a better that this fuck fest.

There was a crushing weight against his chest.  It was so stupid.  It wasn’t like he expected Harry to return his feelings, but he figured his teacher wouldn’t have been so callous.  Harry was always so proper. 

He had to hide this from Roxy.  She didn’t need the chore of mending his broken heart.  It was Christmas, he wasn’t going to ruin the holidays for her because of his own daftness.  He was good at keeping things locked away.  What’s one more?

He cried softly into his comforter, soaking the soft fabric with salty tears and snot.  Attractive.  If Harry could see him now, he’d truly be repulsed.

The cold look in Harry’s eyes haunted him.  He tried to squeeze his eyes shut, but all he saw was killer Harry demanding him leave his classroom, a room he used to be so welcome in.  It was a place where he felt safe, knowing that Harry would always allow him in.  He knew that was dead now.  It was as dead as Nearly Headless Nick.

After the tears stopped falling and only dry heaves were left, Eggsy found the strength to sit up. He stared blankly at the door; it felt so empty without Ryan and Jamal, but at the same time, he was grateful they didn't see this moment of weakness.

His face was red and blotchy. His eyes were blood-shot and still shiny with remaining tears that would not fall. He's sure he didn't have the energy.  He was tempted to look at himself in the mirror, but he knew the sight would be disgusting. Never in his life has he felt this empty and it sucked. All it took to ruin him was a few words from the man that mattered most to him.

He lifted his left hand, touch the heavy pendant around his neck.  Holding the cool coin used to anchor him.  He swallowed hard, throat raw and sore.  It was now ironic, not an hour earlier, the simple bronze 'M' held more significance. It wasn't just a memorial of his father, but Harry Hart gave it to him personally.

His face pinched up in repulse and without a second thought, his hand gripped the chain and tugged it with more force than necessary.  The claps broke easily and hung limply in the young wizard's open palm.

Eggsy closed his eyes and inhaled sharply, tightening his fist around the medallion 'til his knuckles were white.

Harry Hart could go fuck himself. Eggsy opened his hand and looked down before a fire built in his gut and he wanted nothing than to see the thing burn. 

Harry Hart was a right wanker.  Eggsy lifted his hand and tossed the medal, sending it flying across the room.  It hit the wall by the door and landed on the floor with a soft thud.  He didn’t look to see where it landed.  He turned himself over before it hit the floor, broken and forgotten, just like how he felt.  He was broken and just left to be forgotten.

He kicked his trainers of with his toes, letting them fall off the edge of his bed.  He was still in his track suit, but he couldn’t be bothered to change right now.  Instead, he pulled on the quilt beneath him—and after a small struggle pulled it over him.

Tomorrow was Christmas Eve, he just hoped he didn’t run into Harry and could hold everything in for Roxy.  He could keep it together for forty-eight hours, after that, he’d let Roxy know everything.

*****

Christmas came, and for Eggsy, it didn’t hold the magic and excitement he felt for it two days previous.  In fact, when he finally wandered out of his common room and was ambushed by Roxy, he could barely manage more than a grimace when she offered him an enthusiastic ‘happy Christmas’.

“’Bout time you showed your very charming smile.  Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for you?”  Roxy rearranged her grip on the small square package under her right arm.  She was in a simple black turtleneck with light skinny jeans, fitting her like a glove.  “You were supposed to meet me for breakfast.

Eggsy grunted and shuffled his feet, trudging down the hall as if his feet were encased in mud.  “Sorry.  Slept in.”  He was supposed to meet Roxy in the Great Hall at eight so they could exchange gifts.  They had said goodnight at a decent hour last night, he just ended up spending an extra three or so hours crying into his pillow.

“I see.  Honestly, you boys and your sleep.  Do you do anything else?”

“Eat,” Eggsy replied cheekily, hoping to ease Roxy out of her frosty mood.  It seemed to work; the corners of her mouth turned up.

“Well, since you missed breakfast, what do you say we find somewhere more private to open out presents?  I’d rather you not open mine with prying eyes.”

The wizard’s eyebrows shot up in interest.  “Blimey, you didn’t get me one of those adult magazines, did ya?”

“You’re disgusting.  No.  Whatever you keep under your pillow is nothing I want to know.”  The witch’s face pinched up.  While Roxy wasn’t wrong about him keeping something under his pillow, she would never know that it’s the newspaper clipping with Harry’s face gracing the front page.  That was a secret no one knew.

“Aw, come on, Roxy.  You know you’re my girl.”  He wrapped his free arm around her, pulling her to his side.  They stumbled over each other’s feet, but not enough to break their strides.

“I tolerate you at best.”  She finally stopped in an empty corridor closer to Ravenclaw tower.  She took a seat on the stone bench and placed her gift next to her.  “Now sit.”

“Wot?  Here?  Not exactly private, Rox.”  He could hear some giggling in the distance, but it never came near them.  “What about one of the higher towers?” 

Roxy reached out and grabbed Eggsy’s two packages, placing them next to her own.  “We’re doing this here, Eggsy.  I’ve waited long enough, and I don’t feel like taking walk up to the seventh floor.”

Eggsy chuckled and finally took a seat on the other end of the bench.  “Someone wants their gift.”

“No, I want to see your face when you open yours.  Now, here!”  Roxy rarely got this excited, and when she did, you could help but smile.  Even though he still felt still and ached from all his crying, he actually was finding it a lot easier to smile than he thought possible.

He didn’t notice until now, but Roxy had a sprig of holly tied into her ponytail.  It was simple and festive.  She was smiling like a little kid and holding out her gift for him to take.

The packet was about the size of a large textbook.  He hoped that wasn’t what Roxy had gotten him.  Call him ungrateful, but Eggsy never used a book for anything else than school.  It would have been a waste of her money.

The gift was wrapped in shiny red paper with a deep green bow.  It almost looked too nice to rip into, but he also was excited to see what she got him.  He pulled at the bow, which came undone easily.  The paper fell to the floor.

Underneath the paper was a wooden box made of oak with a dark finishing.  It looked old and expensive.  Inside the box were several things: a box of every flavour beans, gummy slugs, chocolate frogs and other sweets.  Next to the treats was a thick divider made of the same burgundy velvet that lined the inside.  In the little square laid a navy blue bag with a drawstring tie.

“That’s your gift,” Roxy spoke up, though Eggsy was just as smitten with the candy.  He couldn’t think what else she could have gotten him.

He picked up the bag and tested the weight.  The item inside was solid and had some weight to it. He pulled at the strings and reached inside.

“Rox!” he exclaimed and turned the silver ornate detailed flask.  In the centre laid a marquise cut emerald in an interact leaf setting.  The base was made of an ornate foliate (less detailed than the ones around the gem) designed.  On the back was the same detailed setting, but instead of an emerald, E.U in engraved in the delicate silver.  “This is fucking too much.  It must have cost you a bomb.”

Roxy’s smiling bright, hands clasped together at her chest.  “I’m glad you love it.  You are too hard to shop for, Eggsy.  I didn’t want to get you just sweets.  And then I saw this at a shop in Diagon Alley.  I’ve had it for months.”

“You’re too much, Roxy.”  He slipped the silver flask back in the velvet bag and leaned over to hug her, kissing her cheek.

“I know.  I’m the best.”  She rubbed his back.  She paused for a second, too quick for Eggsy to notice, but something felt off.  This hug was different than the one he gave her earlier.  That one had been playful and loose.  This one, Eggsy was clutching her, his hand gripping the back of her shirt like it was an anchor of some sort.

Eggsy didn’t realize how much he needed this hug until now.  Earlier he had been swept up into Roxy’s holiday spirit, too busy to think, but now, sitting alone with his friend, he realized how much he needed someone to just hold him.

“You know, I know I’m a damn good hugger, but when can I open my gifts?” the girl teased when Eggsy didn’t make a move to let go.

Oh shit.  He immediately let go and laughed, trying to brush off the awkward feeling.

“Righ’.  Sorry.”  He closed the box and placed on the bench.  “Go ahead.”  He held up the smaller of the two boxes—the one he wanted her to open first.

She tore at the paper and opened the small cardboard box.  A small glass ball fell into Roxy’s open palm. 

Roxy frowned and narrowed her eyes, unimpressed by Eggsy joke.  “I think you mixed up my gift with yours.”  Holding out the Remembrall.

The boy chuckled, smiling all too proudly.  “Nah.Tha' ’sall yours.  Bought it for you ‘specially.”  He pushed her hand back.  “Notice you’ve been needin’ one for a while.”

“You’re such an arse,”  Roxy smirked and chucked the ball at Eggsy head, which he dodged.  The Remembrall fell to the ground with a hard ‘clank’ sound, rolling way.  “If anyone needs one, it’s you.”

She reached for her second gift—her real one—and placed the ripped paper in the small pile they’d created.  She pulled at the rectangular box and pulled out a soft brown leather journal with two bottles of ink.  Unlike the standard black ink, these were coloured.  One was a dark blue with a silver shimmer and the other bronze.

“Eggsy-” she turned the blue ink bottle in her hands “-I love these.  Where did you find these?”

“Had ‘em for awhile.  Bought ‘em before we went back to school.  Had the journal and figured you need ink.  Black is just so boring though. 

“I love them.  Thank you.”  She set the book on the bench and pulled on Eggsy’s shoulders.  “You did a good job with the colours.”

Unlike the earlier hug, Eggsy kept himself in check.  His grip was tight, but not enough to alarm Roxy. 

“Why don’t we go for a walk?” Roxy suggested once they cleaned up their mess and headed down to the Great Hall.  “It’s beautiful outside.  My brother and I used to go for walks on Christmas.”

Eggsy snorted and glanced at Roxy.  “C’mon, it’s freezing.  The Great Hall is righ’ there.  Fire.  Warmth.”  He really didn’t want to go outside. 

“Oh, please.  Eggsy, it’s Christmas.  Twenty minutes.  I just don’t want to go alone.”

He really wanted to say no.  He really did, but Roxy was a tough person to say no to, and especially when she looked so excited about the idea of going for a walk. Just because he was feeling shitty didn’t mean he needed to drag Roxy with him.

Reluctantly, he gave in.  He frowned, but as soon as two arms went flying around his neck, almost knocking his gift out of his hand, he couldn’t help but grin.  It was small and didn’t quite fill his face.

They parted ways to retrieve their cloaks from their dorms.  Eggsy just pulled his scarf from his trunk when he paused.  Lying amongst his tangled pile of clothes was Harry’s almost-forgotten gift.  He had dumped it unceremoniously into his trunk that night, hoping to forget about it completely. 

His eyes began to burn again and his chest tightened at Harry’s words began to echo in his head.

_“Highly inappropriate.”_

_“Your abuse.”_

_“Abuse.”_ That word probably hurt the most.  It was a dirty word.  A hurtful word.  Dean abused him.  He tore him down verbally each day he was around.  He called him names, slurs, derogatory remarks. Did Harry really think he was on the same level of Dean?

He didn’t realize that his eyes began to water until a few tear rolled down his cheeks.  Fuck, he really was pathetic.

When he caught up with Roxy, she narrowed her eyes.  She looked like she was about to comment on his keeping her waiting, but she took one good look at him and just said: “glad you remembered your gloves.”

Eggsy wasn’t sure how bad he looked.  He waited before his eyes didn’t look like tears were waiting to fall.  He hadn’t cried enough to leave his face red and blotchy, but he also knew he didn’t look a cheerful as when he let Roxy.  He could hide shit, but not from Roxy.  He only hoped she’d spare him for the time being.

They walked out of the Castle together, making small talk as they walked down the bridge.  It was cold, but Eggsy wasn’t going to complain.  It was a welcome sting to his cheeks.  And if his eyes began to water some point between the walk down to the lake and to the edge of the forest, well, he could just blame it on the harsh wind that began to pick up.

******

Once the feast started, Roxy began to talk about something; Eggsy was not quite sure since his eyes wandered over to the head table, and more importantly to a certain teacher.  Harry’s head was turned away from him, facing Professor King.  He averted his gaze when Roxy called for his attention, nudging him in the ribs.

“Hey.  You know this is the third time you’ve spaced on me today.  What’s going on.”  She’d ignored it when they went to the Owlery and Eggsy let his owl fly off without his letter attached.  She ignored his distant behaviour at lunch when she suggested they go to the library and he replied with “Sure.”  Now at dinner, Eggsy was just moving his fork around, stirring his potatoes with his corn.

“I’m fine.  Just tired.  Christmas jus' isn’ my thing.”

The blonde scoffed.  “Eggsy, two days ago you were lighting up like a Christmas tree, now, you’re as dull and dark as the Black Lake.  What happened?  It’s not your mum, is it?”  She reached out to touch Eggsy wrist.  He pulled back before she could.

“Mum’s fine.  ‘Snothing to do with home.”

“Then what is it?”  Roxy frowned and tilted her head.  “You can tell me, Eggsy.  Whatever it is, I’m not going to leave you.”

For a brief moment, Eggsy’s flickered back to Harry.  He was still talking to Professor King, unknowing that one of his students was barely hanging on to his composure.  Roxy missed where his eye went, focusing on his clenched fist.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”  Luckily the students at the table were spaced out in their own little groups, all keeping to themselves.  No one was close enough to eavesdrop on their conversation.  “Please.  Just leave it.”

“Eggsy, I know you prefer to keep things bottled up.  It’s how you fight, but please, I know you, and I know that this behaviour isn’t you.”

The wizard inhaled sharply and bit down on his lip.  “Roxy, I love you, but I don’t want to talk about it.  Not today.Not here.Not where anyone can hear.  It’s Christmas, will you not let me have this day?”

“I would if you weren’t moping around like Moaning Myrtle.  You’ve barely smiled all day and when I…”  Oh!  She trailed off. 

Eggsy was no longer looking at her.  His eyes had found something to the front of the Hall, more importantly, someone.

Eggsy was tuning Roxy out.  He knew the witch meant well, but this wasn’t something he wanted to share.  He promised to not ruin Roxy’s Christmas and he was doing a banged up job at it so far.  She was seeing right through him.  It also wasn’t helping that Harry was acting so relaxed.  His face had held his smile since the feast began, while he could barely manage a grimace.  He swallowed hard, willing down the lump forming in his throat.

Harry’s eyes found his this time and the reaction was both a blessing and a curse.  The professor actually, changing from the rather large smile to his warm signature crooked one.  His eyes sparkled in the warm candlelight.  It was like a dagger to Eggsy heart. 

He wanted to return the smile, pretend that the small act of affection wasn’t crushing him from the inside, but he couldn’t.  He was pretty sure he looked like a deer in headlights and there was nothing he could do about it.  He didn’t hear Roxy’s voice anymore, but he didn’t know if that was because he turned her out or if she actually gave up.  Harry had control of him at this moment and it was fucking terrifying.

He’s not sure how long he stared at Harry with Harry staring back, but it felt like hours when Roxy’s voice pulled him from the fog. 

“Eggsy?” Roxy’s voice was soft and concerned filled.  She lightly touched Eggsy arm, but the young man shifted away, still staring down at his plate.

He didn’t realize that Harry actually looked away before Roxy spoke, being the first one to break the contact.  He wished it had been him, to show Harry he was stronger than most gave him credit for.

“’M fine,” he mumbled and dropped his head to stare down at his plate, wishing he could just get up and leave, but he couldn’t.  If he stood then Harry would see and he would know he was the reason for his hasty departure.  No, he had to battle this feast out.

Roxy wasn’t convinced, but she didn’t press further.  She knew Eggsy didn’t want to talk about how he was feeling.  She barely got it out of him this morning with the promise to never bring it up again.

She knew Eggsy was lying.  She watched the brief exchange between her friend and their DADA professor.  She narrowed her eyes at Professor Hart, who had started discussing something with Professor Fairhare.  Something happened.   This was the second time she’d caught Eggsy staring at Harry. 

“Fine.  But we will talk tomorrow.”  She was reluctant to give into Eggsy, but she also knew the more she pushed, the more Eggsy would avoid her.

The young wizard didn’t reply, just nodded his head and continued to poke his fork in his potatoes, occasionally bringing the silverware to his mouth.

*****

Early next morning, Eggsy climbed out of the Hufflepuff common room to find Roxy standing patiently outside the door.  They didn’t speak for a good minute before Roxy uncrossed her arms and sighed.

“Come with me.”  She walked down the hall, leading the way from the basement to the upper level.  She didn’t check behind her to see if Eggsy was following her; she knew.

They walked up to the seventh floor in silence.  They stopped at the familiar blank wall where Roxy walked past three times.  The door began to form in the stone, making a creaking noise.

“After you.”  Roxy stepped aside.  Eggsy opened the door and stepped into a large room.

“Roxy?” his voice sounded unimpressed.  He walked over to an armchair, looking around the room.  “What the hell is this?” 

The room was morphed into a large sitting room.  There was a large marble fireplace, burning brightly on the other side of the room.  There was a plush red carpet beneath their feet. There were three yellow armchairs off to the left corner of the room, creating the only private area.  There were two large emerald green couches, both on the adjacent sides of the fireplace.  Right next to the left side of the fire and opposite to the marble structure were two deep blue coloured armchairs.  On the seats were yellow pillows, matching the armchairs in the corner.  A dark mahogany coffee table sat in the middle.

Each house banner hung on a separate wall, walls that were made of stone, a light brown colour.  Gold and bronze lamps ran around the room, casting a warm and inviting glow.

“You just put all the houses together.”  It didn’t look horrible though. 

“So?  I’m not allowed in yours and you can’t come into mine.  This is the only way we are promised privacy.  Also silently taking a stance against the rules.  Come.”  She walked over to the couch closest to the fireplace.

Eggsy moved to the armchair facing the fire.  He sat on the armrest and stared into the crackling fireball, watching the flames move up and down. 

They sat in silence, Eggsy waiting for Roxy to make the first move, while Roxy waited for Eggsy to show any sign that he was willing to talk.  She realized quickly that that wasn’t happening.

“This is lovely.  We haven’t been in this room for a long time.” 

Eggsy stumbled upon this room accidentally during his fourth year.  His mum had just told him that Dean invited them to his place for Christmas instead of just spending it in their flat.  He was pissed and angry and needed a place to be alone.  The seventh floor was the less frequent floor in the Castle, but instead of finding an empty hall, Eggsy found something much more intriguing.  He brought Roxy the next day and they spent many times hiding out in the room when they wanted to get away from schoolwork and their classmates.

“Haven’ needed a reason to come here.  Are you going to ask or not?”  He looked up from the floor and stared at Roxy.  She gave him a small smile, but it did nothing to encourage him.

The witch took a deep breath, knowing this was going to get messy, and patience was key.“Did something happen between you and Harry?”

What the fuck?  He knew he wasn’t hiding shit well, but how the hell did she figure out Harry was involved.

“What are you on about?”  His reaction wasn’t helping his argument.

“Yesterday at dinner, your mood changed drastically when you made eye contact with Harry.  I’m just assuming-”

“Jus’ jumping to conclusions, are ya?  Jus' because I get a little upset, suddenly you assume my world is fallin’-”

“I know it’s not your mum since you told me.  Which also excludes Dean.  Eggsy, please-” she shifted her legs, folding her left under her right.  “You even went silent when I suggested we should find Professor Hart and wish him a Happy Christmas.”

“Jus’ didn’ wan' to see him.  Already did tha'.”  Eggsy stood up and moved away from the chair, standing by the suit of armour. 

“You went to see Professor Hart?”  Roxy moved from the couch to the chair, sitting on the armrest Eggsy just abandoned.

“Went to give him his…”  Roxy knew about the quill, but Eggsy had passed it off as a gift for Harry once he graduated.  She never commented on it, but he always got the sense that she disapproved.  “Went to wish him a Happy Christmas.  We ended up talking for a bit.”

His hand subconsciously moved to his neck, the medal still missing.  Earlier he had picked up the useless piece of metal and shoved it deep in his trunk. 

Roxy watched the motion carefully, seeing how her friend stroked the skin of his neck, a distant look in his eyes.  She noticed the lack of a chain when he pulled the collar of his shirt after getting snow down his jacket.

“What did you talk about?”  She would be patient.  If anything, she was patient.  Eggsy was in a sensitive state and she wasn’t going to push him.

“Shit,” it came out as a breathy laugh.  “Jus’ shit.  Talked about holiday plans. Why I neva go home for Christmas.  Told 'im about my dad.  Yeah, I Know.”  He saw Roxy’s eyebrows shoot up.  “Didn’ tell ‘im the whole story, but, turns out he didn’ need it.  He knew.  He always knew.”

“Eggsy.”  Her friend looked at the ground and chuckled humourlessly.  This behaviour was strange, even for Eggsy.

“He knew.” 

“Knew what?  You’re not making any sense, Eggsy.”

“He knew my dad.  Knew him.  Worked with him.”

“What?  Eggsy, I know something is deeply troubling you, but you are acting mental right now.  You have to stop speaking in riddles.”

Eggsy growled and turned to face the wall, focusing on the bronze eagle of the Ravenclaw banner.  “Harry Hart worked with my dad.  He knew my dad was an Auror and had worked with 'im. My dad and Professor Hart and had worked together.  Wha' don’ you get?”

He knew he was being unfair.  He knew taking his anger out on Roxy wasn’t fair to her.  None of this was her fault.  He needed to vent and Roxy was the closest victim. 

To the witch’s credit, she wasn’t even fazed by the sharp tone.  “Well, I mean, Professor Hart only retired as an Auror five years ago.  Your dad passed away eleven years ago.  It would make-”

“I know that.  I jus’ thought, he being-“

“New, and Professor Hart being experienced, you thought they wouldn’t cross paths.”

The boy nodded his head. 

“But that still doesn’t explain why you’re so down.  Doesn’t that excite you?  You always wanted to know how your dad was as an Auror.  Harry would know.”

It should have been a good thing.  He could get answers he wanted, except, he fucked that up.

“There’s, uh, there’s more.”  His eyes were beginning to burn.  “H-Harry, he, uh.  Fuck,” he whispered the last part.

“Eggsy?” Roxy moved to stand up, but Eggsy shook his head, holding out his hand.

“Harry was there when my dad was killed.  My dad was killed durin’ a mission with Professor Hart.  And he was the one who gave me tha' fuckin' medal.  He was the one tha' came to my house to tell my mum he died.”

Wow.  That was a lot to process.  She knew very little about Lee Unwin’s death, but she also knew that Eggsy didn’t know much more than she did.  This was good, wasn’t it?

“You know, I understand that this is a little emotional, but Eggsy, I still don’t understand where this is going.  Was it like a misfired spell?  Professor Hart wasn’t the one who killed your dad, was he?”  Maybe that’s why their teacher took such an interest in her friend.  Helping Eggsy succeed in school was some way of repaying a debt.

“No.  My dad actually saved his life.”  Despite his current turmoil, he managed to pull a small smile to his lips.  “Not sure how; he didn' wan' to go into detail, but he told me my dad died with honour.”  His composure was cracking.  His voice hiccupped on the last couple of words.

“And why aren’t you wearing your medal?”  She remembered back in first year how he proudly explained how his dad got this medal because he died bravely.  He wore it every day.  Seeing Eggsy without it was strange.

She didn’t realize, but Eggsy’s shoulders were shaking.

“Oh, sweetie.”  She walked over to the boy, wrapping her arms around him.  “What really happened? I know you.  This is not enough to break you.  Something else happened.  Tell me.”

“You’re goin’ to be disappointed in me.  You warned me, and I-”

“Eggsy, I promise, whatever it is, my feelings for you will not change.  You’re my best mate, who else’s arse am I going to kick come exam time.  No one else can put up a challenge.”

The wizard snorted and pulled back.  Roxy had a way of making him smile even when he was retelling the story of his heartbreak.

“I started thankin’ Harry.  You know, how he’s helped me and all tha' shit.  And I learned tha' my dad worked with him.  And I told Harry I loved him.”

The room was silent, the only noise was coming from the fire, still burning strongly.  Roxy had her eyes closed and a hand over her mouth.  Eggsy couldn’t look at her.  He knew what she was thinking.  ‘How could he be so stupid?’  ‘Why would he tell Professor Hart that?’  Roxy was going back on her promise and he knew it.

“Oh my God. Eggsy, please tell me you-”

“I did, Rox.  So d-don’t bother finishing that question.”  A few traitorous tears fell from his eyes and he stumbled back, pressing his back against his chair.  “I’m so stupid Roxy.  Fuck!  Why do I always manage to fuck things up?  Harry hates me now.  He h-hates me.”

“Eggsy…”  Roxy’s heart ached for her friend.  She had never seen him so distraught before—so helpless.  “You don’t know that.  He was probably shocked.  It’s not exactly acceptable to confess love for a professor.”

He shook his head.  Roxy’s words were registering to him, but they were wrong.  “He hates me.  Didn’ hear the things he said.  He-h-fuck.  Called me pathetic.  Kicked me out.  T-t-tried t-t—I can’.”

“Okay.  Okay.  Deep breaths.  It’s okay.”  Roxy reached out to pull Eggsy to her, but he just pushed her hands away.  He didn’t want her touching him right now.

“It’s not.  H-He-he,” he couldn't speak at this point.  He found him slipping down his chair, slumping against the cushion.  He was stopped before he fell off the chair, being pulled into the warmth and safety of Roxy’s arms.

“Shh.  It’s okay.  Don’t speak right now.”  She stroked his hair at the nape of his neck, letting him soak her jumper with his tears.  A piece of clothing didn’t matter right now.

“I didn’ mean to s-say it, Roxy.  It-it just sorta slipped out.”  Fuck, he had been so stupid.  Why hadn’t he just run for it or pretend that he never said it?  Why did he push forward and try to say it again?  Because he knew, as much as it was inappropriate, he couldn’t hide the fact that he did love Harry.  Despite his age and his example of love growing up, he knew that he would do almost anything for Harry.  Hell, he’s pushed himself harder in school just to see that proud look on the ex-Auror’s face when he succeeded.

Everything was for Harry.


	3. Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the last part of this story. I apologize for the lateness of it. Holidays, work and school kind of all happened at one and I just didn't have time to update.
> 
> Thank you again to harryhartrainmaker for being such an amazing beta.
> 
>  
> 
> Now for part three, I'm very sorry.

Eggsy was spending longer than usual standing in front of the full-length mirror in the corner of his shared dormitory.  All his mates had already left for class, leaving the room empty. 

He took another long look in the mirror, noticing the differences in his appearance.  For the past two weeks he’d been avoiding Harry, which was easy since he didn’t have classes and therefore mostly just spent time with Roxy.  At night though, that was when he was left alone… with his thoughts.  If he cried for more than one night, well, that was between him and his bed curtains. 

Roxy had never told him to get over his pain.  She told him he had the right to be hurt; rejection stung, and when it was done so callously, well, heartbreak was almost inevitable. Eggsy had scoffed at that word: ‘heartbreak’.  He wasn’t heartbroken over the harsh dismissal from Harry.  He was a bit emotionally battered, sure, but heartbroken? 

Bullshit. Even he knew he was just lying to himself and Roxy.

In the silvered glass, he saw the vulnerability he’d been trying to hide while walking the grounds of Hogwarts.  He saw the emptiness in his eyes and the dark circles from the lack of sleep that Roxy had so _kindly_ pointed out.  Today, besides the usual differences in his appearance, there were several others as well.  His hair was combed neatly, parted to the side.  This was something he seldom did and for some reason, he had decided to don that look today.  He had to admit, he didn’t think it was too bad. His shirt was neatly pressed with the first two buttons undone, something he always did. He preferred wearing his shirt open with his tie loose.  He took hold of his collar and hesitated, before meeting his eyes in the mirror and sighing.  Slipping the buttons through the holes, he did the shirt up completely for the first time in—well, he couldn’t remember how long. 

He grabbed his tie (Hufflepuffs’ signature yellow and black) and skilfully knotted it, tightening it just right around his neck.  He then picked up his grey V-neck jumper—something he hadn’t really worn in a while either—and slipped it around his neck.  He wore his uniform improperly more times than not, Harry—Professor Hart would lightly reprimand him over proper etiquette when it came to school uniforms.  Now, since it didn’t seem like Harry gave a toss about what he did, why was he even trying?  Still, maybe this was for the better.  Maybe he could start working on his professionalism by dressing the part.  Harry was always dressed so properly.  Maybe… No!  He let that idea die before it could form.  He had to show Harry Hart that he didn’t have a hold on him. He reached for his robe, slipping the heavy black fabric on over his uniform, and shouldered his school bag, already packed with the books he needed for his first couple of classes.

Eggsy caught up with Roxy after breakfast and together they headed to their first class, Potions.  DADA was his second to last class today, so as usual, he knew that the day would drag.

True to his assumptions, Potions was a bore.  He found himself bouncing in his seat, receiving a kick to the shins from Roxy more than once.  By lunch, his stomach was churning.  Harry’s class was next.  He didn’t know if he could do this.  Roxy would be with him, but seeing Harry again, knowing that the professor knew of his childish crush, was embarrassing.

When the time for their next class came, Eggsy stood outside the room for a few more minutes than he usually did.  His hair had long since become dishevelled.  He could handle the stuffy uniform, but he needed to keep something of his identity, and the neatly parted hair just wasn’t him.

“Eggsy?”  Roxy lightly touched his arm, gaining his attention.  She dropped her hand instantly though.  “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“No,” he answered truthfully.  What was the point in lying?  He knew she would see right through his shit.  She knew he had been struggling all day, why would he finally be fine the moment he had to face his fear.  “’M not, but I have to do this.”

Roxy nodded and went ahead.  She knew he needed a moment to collect himself, and her hovering over him was not what he wanted.  She looked up to the front of the class where Professor Hart stood in front of his desk, looking as poised and professional as ever.  He smiled at her as she took her seat right at the front.  She noticed his brows creased when he saw the empty seat beside her. He glanced to the back of the room; his features smoothing out when he saw Eggsy—who had his head down and was unaware of the attention from his teacher—walk in.

Eggsy dropped his bag next to his desk and slumped down in his chair.  Only when he was seated did he glance up at Harry, but by then the professor was watching Charlie and his gang take their seats.

He down cast his eyes again, focusing on the grooves and chipped wood of the desk.  He ran his thumb over a long scratch several times.  Harry cleared his throat, calling the class to order, but he still didn’t bother to look up. “Good afternoon, everyone.  I hope you all had a pleasant holiday.”  Harry smiled at them warmly, letting his eyes wander over them.  Eggsy noticed how his eyes purposely skipped him and went to Charlie and Hugo instead.  He wasn’t sure what he had expected, but being skipped over stung. 

“Arse,” he muttered to himself, too low for even Roxy to hear, and yet that was when Harry’s eyes landed on him.  _Shit._

“We have a full lesson planned for today, so please, textbooks out.”  He looked away when Harry refused to be the first.  It was a different exchange than the one they shared at Christmas.  That one had been warm and welcoming.  This one was riddled with tension and awkwardness.  He wanted to feel proud for being the first one to look away, but this was class now, and breaking eye contact with a professor just showed he was uncomfortable.

He reached into his bag and pulled out his bashed about textbook, opening it to a random page.  He didn’t care.  He’d just copy Roxy’s notes later.  He leaned forward, resting his elbow on the desk and then his chin on his forearms.  Class hadn’t even officially begun and already he wanted to go back to the dorm.

Maybe he could fake being sick.  He still had some puking pastilles in his bag.  The idea was almost too tempting, but it was also unrealistic.  Harry would know he was faking it.  He was stuck in class until Harry dismissed them.

*****

It was their fourth class with Harry since term resumed.  To say the class had a different atmosphere would be an understatement.  It wasn’t just the awkward tension between Eggsy and Harry, but all their lessons had a heavy weight hanging in the air.  They still had a few months before exams, but Professor Valentine hadn’t been joking when he’d said lessons would get more grueling the closer they got to June.  No one was dicking around.

Harry was now going over last week’s assigned reading, asking a question when he felt a piece of material was essential to point out. “We’ll start off today’s questions with a simple one,” he announced once everyone had their books opened to the right chapter.  His book was laid effortlessly in his right hand, as if it wasn’t a huge tome over five hundred pages long.  His left hand was bent in a gentlemanly manner behind his back as he walked the length of his desk.

Eggsy stared down at the picture of the zombie-like man crawling around on the ground like Gollum.  The creature looked like it was trying to devour him just from the page. 

“You’d better hope he asks you a question you know the answer to,” Roxy whispered, glancing at Harry from the corner of her eye.  She knew Eggsy hadn’t read past the third page of the chapter.  He’d already gotten scolded by Harry last week when he hadn’t reviewed the chapter about nonverbal spells.

Eggsy, who surprisingly excelled at nonverbal spells, hadn’t felt the need to ‘waste his time’ on a chapter he read back in year six.  Though, what he hadn’t told Roxy was that he had spent an hour a day in the Room of Requirements for weeks, practicing defensive spells.

That class, Harry had been less than pleased with Eggsy’s abysmal lack of preparation, telling him off in front of everyone, which had led to a tense moment, and Eggsy sending Harry’s water glass flying into the chalkboard without a word.  Luckily, he had done that after class.  During class he had only shrugged and given some bullshit excuse that he couldn’t even remember.

“You were to read about Necromancy and the creatures it can summon.  What is the intended goal of Necromancy?” His eyes flickered to Eggsy, causing the younger wizard’s heart to accelerate.  Eggsy was the one to break eye contact this time, glancing down at his text.  He scanned the first few paragraphs, trying to find the answer.  He knew what the outcome was: your dead uncle’s zombie. “Mr Taylor?  Would you like to answer?”  Harry picked William Taylor, a Gryffindor who sat close to the back.  Eggsy had only talked to him a couple of times in class, but he seemed like an all right bloke.  He was a Gryffindor after all.  Far better than giving Charlie, Piers, Hugo or Digby the chance.  This was practically a free question.

“It’s used to bring people back from the dead.  It’s mainly employed as a Dark Art.”

“Very good.”  Professor Hart smiled vaguely and glanced down at his book.  “To reiterate Mr Taylor’s answer, Necromancy has the ability to raise one from the dead.  However, we all know that that is quite impossible.  Those raised are not truly whom they once were-”

“Because they look like a fuckin’ zombie,” Eggsy muttered to himself.  Even though he hadn’t read the chapter, he could tell just by looking at the creature on the page in front of him that it was anything but alive.

The professor suddenly stopped his sentence and cocked an eyebrow in the boy’s direction.  “Would like to add something, Mr. Unwin?”

Eggsy opened his mouth, running his tongue along the back of his teeth.  “No, sir.”  He had several things he would like to say, but all would probably result in him spending the rest of the school year in detention.

“Then perhaps you would like to answer my next question?”  Harry wasn’t giving him a choice. He could tell by the rigid tone.  His cocoa-coloured eyes didn’t dare leave Eggsy, even when he recited the question, memorized by his brilliant brain. “An Inferius is one of the creations from this magic.  It is immune to several things, but like everything, it has a weakness.  What would your best defence against an Inferius be, and what would you avoid using?”

It was a simple question, for someone who had read the text.  He knew about Inferii, having heard about them before, but all he knew was that they were just like puppets.  They were dead bodies without souls or minds to think for themselves.  They were better than zombies though, because they could be controlled. He felt like this was a trick question.  If they were dead, then obviously very little harmed them, but Harry was probably looking for a specific answer.  As for what their weakness was, they could have been anything.  A spell?  Were they like Dementors where only one spell stopped them?  Was it something different, something that wasn’t just magic? 

“Mr. Unwin,” Harry chided after a long moment.  Roxy applied a kick to his ankle and moved her eyes from him to Harry in a reminder.  “The answer?”

“Fire?”  It was a guess; he had nothing to lose.  He didn’t know the correct answer anyway.

“Is that your answer or are you guessing?  Are you saying fire is useless or a source of defence?”

Eggsy gritted his teeth at the chastising tone in Harry’s voice.  He didn’t need to look up from the groove on his desk to know that Harry was frowning at him, undoubtedly disappointed.

“Eggsy, did you not review the readings at all?”  The soft thud of Harry closing his textbook and dropping it on his desk came shortly. The young wizard mumbled an excuse, probably too low for Harry to hear, but it was pointless.  Harry wasn’t done yet. “Because if you had, you would know that since Inferi are dead bodies and therefore do not have souls, and are by no means truly alive, they are immune to bodily damages.   They feel no pain; so most spells would be ineffective.  Your best defence would be fire.” Eggsy felt hot under the collar.  The classroom suddenly felt stuffy and the tie around his neck was too constricting.  Harry still watched him, like he half expected a fair explanation.

“Jus’ been busy,” was his nonchalant reply.  He saw the irritation flash through Harry’s eyes, but as quickly as it came, it was gone.  His mouth was set in a hard line.

“I suggest you better prepare for next class.  Your lack of effort in this class will not be tolerated, Mr Unwin.  These chapters I’ve assigned will be on your final exam.  If you’re not going to participate properly, perhaps you would like to go and have a word with Professor Valentine?”

It was a thinly veiled threat that everyone but Eggsy expected Harry to follow through on.  The young wizard knew that Harry was just trying to scare him.  He’d made his fair share of cheeky remarks that should have gotten him sent to the Headmaster’s office, and that Harry always ignored.  This was minor in comparison.

By the time class was dismissed, Eggsy was pissed off and tired.  Even after Harry had called on him for the Inferi question, he had called him on again for yet another question he didn't know and singled him out again for having not prepared.  Well, _sorry_.  It wasn't like he didn't read it on purpose.  He couldn't open his bloody textbook because every fucking time he did he was haunted by Harry's words.

What he also failed to mention was that his Mum had written to him last Saturday, informing him—gleefully informing would be too bitter to say —that she was going to marry Dean.  She had then started banging on how he’d never given Dean a chance and that the fat, obnoxious prick he’d hated for years was supposedly a ‘good man’. 

He was still reeling from that.  He had almost found himself heading to the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom that night, before quickly bypassing it in the direction of Ravenclaw Tower.

“Eggsy, wait for me!”  He could hear Roxy run after him, but he continued to walk, not slowing his stride in the slightest.

“Don' wanna talk about it, Rox.”  He adjusted his book bag over his shoulder.  He knew a few students were watching him.  Harry's behaviour wasn't exactly subtle when the man had spent a better half of his school years favouring Eggsy. He turned the corner, nearly running into Digby, who of course was standing with Charlie and the two other trolls. 

He skidded to a halt, allowing Roxy to catch up with him, but he continued on, brushing past twats number one, two, three and four.

“Where’re you going, Roxy?” Piers taunted, earning round of snickering.

“Embarrassed that you’re no longer Professor Hart’s favourite, Eggy?” Charlie chimed in.  “Seems you’ve been replaced.”  When Eggsy failed to produce the right answers or an answer at all, Charlie had taken the opportunity to volunteer several answers, earning praises from their teacher.

“Sod off.  Fuckin’ dickhead,” he gritted the last part to himself.

“It was one class, Charlie,” Roxy deadpanned.  “It will hardly outshine all the lessons you’ve refused to participate in.  Let’s just go.”  The witch’s voice was much gentler as she led Eggsy around Charlie and his gang. 

“Going to cry to your little girlfriend, now that Professor Hart’s no longer an option?’

“Fuck off, Charlie!” Eggsy snapped. “You so sad you got nothin’ else betta to do than to piss on everyone else’s day?” 

Charlie eyes brightened with excitement at Eggsy’s words. He loved nothing better than to rile the Londoner up.

“You know, I very well could-” He turned to Hugo and Rufus, laughing like it was the funniest thing he’d ever said. “-But why would I?”  Charlie took on a thoughtful expression for a moment, which on him looked more like he’d smelled troll vomit.  He crossed his arms across his chest and let out a breath that sounded more like a hiss.  “You’re too much fun to wind up.”

“I like I said: fuck off.  I ain’t putting up with your bullshit today.”

For a moment, Roxy thought her friend would walk away.  She had kept quiet, hoping Eggsy would do the right thing and just ignore Charlie’s words, but then the stupid tosser had to speak again.  Eggsy’s shoes squeaked against the marble floor as he stopped.

“Not really that tough, are you?  This is why you’re in Hufflepuff; you’re just a pleb.  You don’t have any special-”

“’M warnin’ you now, Hesketh.  You betta shut the fuck up.”

“Eggsy,” Roxy moaned, dropping her head forward.  “You know this is what he wants.” The young wizard was aware of Roxy’s warning, but he was done.  Today had been shitty enough without Charlie adding to it.  After seven years of this bullshit, he was done.

Charlie smirked at the challenge and his eyes narrowed. “Or what? Gonna go running home?  Back where you belong.  Bet your mum would love to hear how-” The boy cut off with a loud groan of pain.  He clutched his nose, which smarted badly.  He’d felt more than seen Eggsy’s fist come for him.

Eggsy, who still had his hands balled tightly, was furious.  “Don’ you dare bring my mum into this, you posh, spoiled twat.  You got a problem with me, then that’s who you take it up with.” 

“Eggsy, stop it.”  Roxy was seething now.  Out of all of the stupid, senseless things for Eggsy to do, he had to punch _Charlie Hesketh_.

“Wanna say that again?” Eggsy challenged, sounding far too cocky for his own good.  He took a step towards the injured boy, straightening to his full height to make himself look bigger.

“You-” The taller boy growled, wincing in pain when he scowled.  “You’ll pay for that.”  The Slytherin launched himself at the offender, grabbing the front of Eggsy’s robes.  Despite Eggsy being a couple of inches shorter, he pulled at Charlie’s tie and shirt, shoving him back easily.

“Charlie!” someone whispered harshly.  If the two wizards weren’t so focused on each other, they would have realized that Hugo was the one who had spoken and it was only because Harry was now standing in front of them.

“Would someone like to explain to me what exactly is going on here?”  The eerily calm voice spooked the two wizards apart, as if they had just been hexed.

“I-I-” Charlie babbled, trying to find a way to turn the blame away from him.

Harry raised an eyebrow, looking tired and bored, like he’d dealt with enough of this idiotic behaviour for the day.  “Yes, Mr. Hesketh?”  He waited for a long moment before turning to Eggsy.  “Mr. Unwin?”

Eggsy, who’d spent most of his childhood learn to stay silent, wasn’t one to grass anyone up, no matter how much they deserved it.  There was also the detail that he couldn’t give Harry the truth without admitting to throwing the first punch.

“It was Eggsy who-”

“I didn’t ask for you to answer on the behalf of Mr. Hesketh, Mr. Higgins.”  Harry glanced at Roxy, but she stayed silent.  There wasn’t much she could do to help.  “Now, I don’t know what happened here, and I would rather it stayed that way, unless you two would enjoy a detention.”

Charlie shook his head, practically crying with relief.  Posh boys never survived in detention.

“Then I’ll ask you all to return to your dormitories.  I don’t want this to happen again, understand?”

All three Slytherins nodded and hurried away before Harry could change his mind.  Eggsy wasn’t so grateful.  He almost wished Harry hadn’t stepped in.  He could have really done some damage to that pinched up face.

His jaw was set tightly and he refused to take his eyes off of Harry, who was walking towards him.

“You know how to fight.” The professor’s tone was soft, but stern.  “But next time, go for your wand.  It’s more efficient, especially when your opponent doesn’t know what attack you’ll use.” 

Whatever cheeky remark Eggsy thought up died on his lips that moment.  He glanced at Roxy and back to Harry.

“Goodnight, Eggsy.”  The ex-Auror bowed his head politely and walked down the hall.

“The fuck was that?”  Roxy shrugged, looking just as puzzled as her friend.  Harry may have favoured Eggsy, but that never did stop him from giving the young wizard detention.  If anything, Professor Hart was the one to assign the most detentions in the school.

“You’re lucky he didn’t give you detention.”

“And I didn’ even get to show Charlie what a _pleb_ like me can really do.”

 

*****

After a month of trying to reach out to Harry, Eggsy was getting tired.  It wasn’t like Harry was avoiding him.  He would have a conversation with Eggsy if the young wizard had a question, but he was diplomatic and polite rather than friendly.  Every time he tried to start a conversation about anything besides school, Harry conveniently remembered a stack of essays he was in the middle of grading or that he had a meeting with another professor.

After four Fridays where Harry either wasn’t in his office, was in a meeting or had left the school altogether, Eggsy was pissed.  Yes, he had fucked things up at Christmas, but Harry was being the child by not letting him apologize and fix things.

So, it was only natural that by the fifth Friday of Harry cancelling their meetings/embarrassing him in class, Eggsy found himself storming into the DADA classroom.  Harry, as he knew he would be, was sat at his desk, head down with a quill in his hand, marking.

Eggsy stood in front of the large mahogany desk, waiting for Harry to give him his attention.

A long second went by and Eggsy was about to clear his throat when Harry finally spoke up.

“Hello Eggsy. To what do I owe this pleasure?”  The ex-Auror had the nerve to look like he was confused as to why his student was standing in front of his desk on a late Friday afternoon.  He placed his quill in his ink bottle and folded his hands together.

“It’s Friday.”  The young wizard shrugged, as if that was enough.  “We haven’ done our... It’s been a month since...”  He really didn't know what to call their conversations.  They started out as tutoring, but that had long since changed.  “Was wondering if we could talk.”  There, that worked.  It was to the point without giving anything away. Harry studied Eggsy with scrutinizing eyes.  Eggsy nearly backed down from the intense gaze, but he managed to remain strong.

“Eggsy, I appreciate your enthusiasm, wanting to continue with your schoolwork even after class is done,” Harry said evenly.  “But I am unfortunately very busy tonight.  Perhaps another time?”

What a load of bollocks.

Eggsy’s frown deepened, his brows creasing.  He took a small step forward, still keeping a polite distance from Harry’s desk.

“You’s been sayin' that for over a month now.  You can’ seriously have all these meetings every Friday.  You neva did before.”  His voice rose slightly, not enough to sound petulant, but enough to suggest his irritation with his professor’s avoidance.

“Exams are coming up, Eggsy.” Harry said it as if it were so bluntly clear.  His tone was condescending and his smile matched.  “I have many other things to commit to. I cannot arrange my schedule around you.  I will be busy in the forthcoming weeks, but if you have a question about your assigned homework, I will be happy to answer it, otherwise we will simply have to reschedule.”

“Cut the shit, bruv.” The words were out before he could stop them.  He knew the kind of trouble he would get into for speaking to a professor in such a way, but it was too late now.  Instead of grovelling and asking for forgiveness, he pushed on.  He was tired of Harry’s distant behaviour.  He was angry that just because of a stupid confession Harry was punishing him by not allowing him to explain himself.  Well, he was done.  “You’re pissed and you're takin' it out on me.  You’ve cancelled on me for the past five Fridays and you've been a right bastard in class.  You knew damn well I knew about Pixies and instead you asked Charlie.  But you call on me when you know I don't know the answer.  Why is that?”

He took a deep breath, trying to calm down.  His teeth were grinding together, anticipating the earful he was about to receive.  He didn’t have any right to speak that way to Harry, who was his superior, but he needed this. He needed to let Harry know that he was going mental with the silence.  He waited for the reprimanding to begin, but instead, Harry’s voice was soft and levelled.

“Eggsy,” he sighed, sounding bored.  So, instead of anger it was irritation.  Eggsy was an inconvenience.  Fucking great.  “It’s my job as your teacher to challenge you.  Especially on materials you may not know.  It’s not my fault you didn’t do the assigned readings.”  The ex-Auror looked at Eggsy over his glasses, challenging him to dare speak against him.  “It’s against my nature to show favouritism amongst my students.”

“Yet you had no problem before.  Helpin’ me with my homework.  Giving me points about future lessons.  Ignoring the fact tha’ I hex Charlie on school grounds.  You would've railed anyone else for that.”

“I have never favoured a student, Eggsy.  I don’t favour any of my students.  It causes bias and misjudgment.  I took a liking to you, Eggsy, because I thought it would be a disgrace to your father’s memory to allow his son to waste his education, when he did nothing but work to provide for his family.”

Eggsy felt like he had been punched in the gut.  He was sure he was going to be sick.  He felt like he was suddenly the punch line of some horrible joke.  Tears were burning in the back of his eyes, but he was not going to cry in front of Harry.  He wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of watching Eggsy Unwin fall apart.

“Fine,” he bit out, taking a step back as if he’d been hit.  “Fanks for clearing that up.  Stupid to assume someone actually believed in me.”  He looked down at the floor and scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief.  Fuck, he was so naïve.  Well, not anymore.  He was done with Harry's ‘kindness’.  As much as he was sure that those favours ended the moment he made that stupid confession, he was done trying to repair the damage.  He made his peace, he was honest with Harry, and in return, he was singled out in front of his classmates.

He was done with Harry fucking Hart.  He knew he was going to suffer without his guidance, but he survived just fine before.  He still had Roxy and he knew she’d be damned if she let him slip back into his old ways.

No, he’d made it this far, he was going to prove to Harry that he could finish this without him.  The future of his education did not depend on a self-righteous bastard.

“Eggsy?”  His tone was emotionless, but it wasn't cold like before. Just... Distant.

He hadn’t realized it, but his hands were clenched at his sides, hidden by the sleeves of his robe.

He smiled tightly and shook his head. “S'alright.”

He straightened up, not allowing himself to slouch; it was something he did that Harry always complained about.  He suddenly wished he hadn’t leaned so hard on Harry.  Hadn’t taken him up on all his help.  It just made him seem petulant now that he was closing himself off since it wasn’t going his way.  Now he knew that Harry hadn’t done any of this for him, it was all to repay some sick debt Harry thought he owed his father. 

Of course no one cared about him.  If he were to disappear tomorrow from the school, no one would give a fuck.  Roxy would be pissed for a while, but she’d get over it.  She had a much more promising future than he did.  The fact that she’d put up with his shit this long was shocking enough as it is.

“Thank you for all your help.  I'll see you in class, Professor.”  He glanced at Harry, masking his expression.  His face was blank, giving nothing away about the emotional battle he was fighting inside.  He stepped back again and turned around, refusing to look back.  A part of him wished Harry would call him back, let him know he did do at least some of it for him, but the teacher remained silent, and when the heavy wooden door slammed shut behind him, Eggsy let himself slump against it.  He tried to blink the tears away.  He did a good job with Harry, but now that he was out of the room, there was no stopping the dam from bursting.

He stumbled away from the carven doorway and rushed down the corridor.  He passed several students on his way, some sixth-year Hufflepuffs who called out to him, but he paid them no mind.  He wiped his eyes, trying to erase the traitorous tears, but they were still coming, silent, and unstoppable. 

He made it to an empty corridor on the far side of the sixth floor.  His goal was the Room of Requirements, but he wasn’t going to make it up another set of stairs.  He slumped against the stone wall and let himself collapse, sliding down in defeat. 

His right leg stuck out in front of him while he kept his left bent, resting his arm on his knee. 

Now that he was alone, he finally let down his walls.  His chest began to heave with ragged breaths and his vision blurred once more.  He didn’t sob.  He wasn’t going to give Harry the satisfaction.  He let the tears trickle down his cheeks, leaving fiery wet tracks in their wake. 

He was biting his lip, trying to control his breathing, but all it was doing was cutting off the harsh breaths, making them sound choked off.  He dropped his head back, resting it on the cold stone and staring up at the high ceiling.  He suddenly felt so small in this huge castle.  There were students here who commanded the school, ruled the halls so to speak.  Ones whom no one dared to mess with—Roxy was one of those students.  Those who decided to spend their time floating through the school as unnoticed as possible, yet still very much belonged, and then there were the ones who just didn’t belong.  Those like Eggsy who only made it this far because they caught a lucky break.

He knew why Harry’s confession stung.  It wasn’t like he hadn’t been disappointed before, but for a moment, even with Harry continuously ignoring him, he thought that Harry’s behaviour was a way of keeping himself at a distance but still making sure he challenged himself.  Instead, he realized just how wrong he really had been.  This was why he never relied on anyone.  He only ended up feeling empty and defeated when they dropped him.

Dinner was going to start soon, and he knew Roxy would be looking for him, but he couldn’t face her.  Not like this.  As much as she’d been there for him after Christmas, she wasn’t going to be sympathetic this time.  This one was all on him.  She told him to let it go, but he couldn’t, and now he was crying in some abandoned hallway with bigger wounds than he had before.  This was one thing he was not going to tell her.  This time, he was keeping it to himself.

*****

Slowly the snow melted away.  The green began to show and the flowers around the grounds began to bloom.  While spring was usually a happy time at Hogwarts, for Eggsy, it was agonizing.  March dragged by and so did April.  All he wanted was for the N.E.W.T.s to come so he could do them and get the hell away from Hogwarts.

He’d never thought he would say it, but he was looking forward to the exams.  They were the last thing standing in his way of going home.  Things between Harry and him didn’t change.  They never really talked outside of class, and even when they did it was only when Eggsy had no choice but to ask for the ex Auror’s help.

By the end of May, exams were looming over them and the atmosphere around the castle changed dramatically.  There was a cloud of tension in the air.  Fifth years were worrying about their [O.W.Ls](http://O.W.Ls), while all the seventh years were stressing about their N.E.W.Ts.  Even Roxy, who maintained such calmness back in fifth year, was spending a lot more time in the library. 

Eggsy kept his promise to himself and refused any help from Harry.  It wasn’t like his professor offered help, but he never pursued his teacher to resume their weekly meetings.  Harry had been the one to end them.  He got the message that he was no longer wanted in his office.  Instead, he spent most of his free time in the library with Roxy or the Great Hall with Ryan and Jamal.  Even they realized the importance of these exams and spent the occasional free period studying.

It was the night before exams when Eggsy found himself in the back of the library with Roxy.  It was going onto nine, and while the library usually closed at eight, Headmaster Valentine had decided to extend the hours for those doing exams.

“You ready for tomorrow?”  Eggsy thumbed at his Transfiguration textbook.

Roxy looked up from the notes she was scribbling down and shrugged.  “I’ve done the best I can.  I doubt the test won’t challenge me, but that’s what these exams for.  If they were easy we wouldn’t be studying so hard.”

Leave it to Roxy to give such a diplomatic answer.  She wasn’t answering his question, but he’d known her long enough to see that she was nervous.  Even the smartest of them weren’t taking these exams with ease.

“You’ll do fine.  If anyone can pull this off, it’s you, Rox.”  He smirked when Roxy tried to pass off her faint blush. 

“Saying that’s not going to help you, Eggsy.  I don’t want to see your textbook closed until it’s time to turn in.”

The wizard rolled his eyes, still smiling.  He opened his book, turning to the page he marked off.  His brain was starting to hurt from reading so many words, memorizing so many spells and analyzing so many pictures, but Roxy was right.  They only had two hours before they had to head back and then they had their first exam at nine tomorrow morning.  He was seriously considering pulling through the whole night.

“‘M ready.  ‘M not confident I’ll get top scores, but I’m ready.”  That nervous, sickening feeling was filling him now.  His stomach was starting to churn at the mere thought of food.  At dinner, he had only managed to eat a spoonful of mashed potatoes and two bites of his chicken.  The sweets he brought for their study group had long since become unappealing.

Roxy cocked her head to the side, frowning.  Even after passing all his final tests and assignments with exceptionally high grades, Eggsy still had no confidence in himself to pass these exams.  She knew why.  Eggsy had become too dependent on Harry telling him that he had nothing to worry about when it came to tests, and now that the biggest ones were upon them, and Eggsy had lost that support system, he felt inadequate compared to everyone else.  She tried to be just as encouraging as their professor, but she knew it wasn’t the same.  Her words didn’t hold a candle to Harry’s.

“Fanks, Rox.  But ‘m not so sure.”  He ran a finger over the rough parchment, looking down at the words, but they didn’t mean anything to him right now.  He had pushed himself during the past few months.  He didn’t allow himself to fall back in his old habits.  He didn’t know if it was because he wanted to prove himself to Harry or because he’d have Roxy kicking his ass if he so much as slipped in his attendance for class.  Whatever it was, it wasn’t because he believed that he could make it through the exams after coming so far. 

Charms and Herbology were the ones he was struggling with—even when Harry had helped him— and they were two of the crucial subjects he needed to become an Auror.  Anything less than _Exceeds Expectations_ and he would be saying goodbye to that dream.

“Well, if you keep up that dreadful attitude, you _will_ fail.  You need to believe that you can do it.”  She reached over and took Eggsy’s hand.  It was a sign of affection that they didn’t really show most of the time.  Neither cuddled each other, but right now, he needed this. 

“Two weeks, then we’re done here.”  It wasn’t exactly acceptance, but it was Eggsy’s one way of saying she was right.  He could get through this, and in two weeks, they’d be taking the train back to London and moving on with their future.  He’d be with his mum again, and if everything worked in his favour, he’d finally be able to provide for her, and get her away from Dean.

“Two weeks and then we can celebrate.  Right now-” The blonde slid a long piece of parchment towards Eggsy. “-I want you to test me.”

Eggsy narrowed his eyes playfully.  “You play dirty, Morton.  Here I thought we was havin’ a touching moment.  You was just using me.”  He picked up the parchment nevertheless and picked a random definition.

“No.  You love me and wouldn’t want to see me fail.”  Roxy leaned forward and arched an eyebrow in challenge.

They both shared a smile, and despite the uncertainty of the next two weeks hanging over them, they both knew that it would somehow work out in the end.

*****

Eggsy walked through the halls, having finished his final exam.  Seven excruciating exams in the span of two weeks. There was a reason why they were called Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tests.  He was fucking knackered.  If he went to bed right now, he’d probably sleep until next week.

He studied every free moment he had.  During his meals he had his textbooks with him.  He and Roxy spent hours in the library quizzing each other, but knowing his luck, it probably did bugger all.  He was hopeless.  He needed at least five ‘Exceeds Expectations’, or preferably ‘Outstanding’s, but this was him. Getting those marks in N.E.W.T exams was already as rare as the sun shining in the Forbidden Forest.  That shit just didn’t happen. 

He just wanted to find Roxy and forget about everything until his results came.  He hadn’t seen her since that morning before he left the library for his exam.  Roxy hadn’t had an exam today since it was the only class he didn’t have with her.  Her last one was the next day, which probably meant he’d be quizzing her tonight.  She had helped him last night, staying up very late, asking him questions.   

Care of Magical Creatures was boring, only marginally better than Divination, and not having Roxy there didn’t help.  Sadly, he didn’t get the [O.W.Ls](http://O.W.Ls) in History of Magic to allow him to take the N.E.W.T class.

He did have Jamal with him, but his friend was more into cramming the night before. Eggsy had been like that, until he failed a test in DADA, which Harry practically railed him for.  Okay, he was disappointed in him, but he should have just stunned him because the spell would have hurt a lot less than seeing the upset look in the professor’s eyes.  That had been after he failed.  It kind of all happened at once, which was why Harry started insisting they meet twice a week to discuss school and class work.  In fourth year that had quickly turned to once every week, and wasn’t just about his classes.

Harry, unsurprisingly, was brilliant in almost every subject.  Not only did he help Eggsy with DADA, but also with Charms, Herbology, Potions (the one subject next to Defence that he didn’t need much help in), and Transfiguration. 

That had all ended when he’d opened his mouth and made that moronic confession that inevitably led to the most gutting feeling he’d ever experienced.  He’d faced rejection before, but nothing like that. 

After trying for nearly a month to talk to Harry-he knew all those meetings Harry scheduled on Fridays weren’t by coincidence—Eggsy took the hint and left Harry alone.  At least until that day he had embarrassingly stormed into Harry’s classroom, demanding to know what his problem was.  He would have been mortified looking back on that memory, but instead he just felt numbing pain.  Hearing that he was just an obligation was not what he had expected.  After that, he had left Harry alone.  It hurt like hell to know that Harry never wanted to talk to him again. 

Roxy took Harry’s place, helping Eggsy with school as much as she could, but it wasn’t the same.  She just didn’t have the captivating aura Harry had when he talked about turning vinegar into wine.

That wasn’t fair to Roxy though. She tried, it just didn’t help that he was hopeless.

What a way to end the two weeks.  If it had been Defence Against the Dark Arts or Potions, he might have been riding a high.  It wouldn’t be until sometime in the summer that the owls would deliver their results, and then jobs became a priority.  Again, something he probably wasn’t going to have to worry about.

He got off the grand staircase on the third floor, heading to the library, knowing Roxy was still there since she wasn’t in the courtyard.  He walked down the corridor, passing a couple of first year Slytherins.  They tried to look intimidating, but Eggsy had about six inches on them and was a seventh year.  He just rolled his eyes.

The corridor was mostly empty.  Classes were still going on for those not taking the N.E.W.T. exams, and most seventh years headed back to their dormitories once they were done.  It was weird for the halls to be this empty, even at Christmas it hadn’t felt like the castle was so vacant.

He made a right, coming to another empty corridor. However, it didn’t remain empty for long.

“Eggsy,” a deep and all too familiar voice sounded behind the young wizard.

The boy stiffened, stopping on the spot.  He heard the quiet echo of footsteps behind him, moving closer.  He chanced a look, turning his head to the left, to catch Harry’s soft, warm eyes right away.  Damn.

“Professor Hart.”  He nodded stiffly, watching as Harry walked around him to face him.  He remembered the times he had almost slipped and called Harry by his first name.  It hadn’t been healthy making a habit of doing so in his head, but now, that seemed so distant; just a memory.

His heart was thundering in his chest.  He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding until his lungs started burning.  This was the first time Harry had approached him outside of class and while other students weren’t around.  He felt exposed.

Harry smiled an unusually kind smile that was different from the one he gave him when he was called upon in class.  It was the one Harry used to give him, but after months of only receiving a tight, closed-lipped smile, it felt wrong.

“I’m surprised to see you wandering around.”  Harry cocked an eyebrow smoothly, the smile never once leaving his face.

Eggsy wanted to wipe the smirk from the professor’s face.  For Harry to act like everything that had happened between them in the past months did not happen was gutting.  He wanted to scream; demand Harry to tell him what he really wanted.  There was no reason for Harry to be on the third floor.  Harry probably sought him out to tear into him one last time before he had to leave next week.

As if it wasn’t painful enough to force a smile at the ex-Auror, pretending everything was fine, it hurt even more that his relationship with Professor Hart was ruined and he’d be leaving everything behind next week.  Suddenly, everything was happening so fast.

“Done my exams.  Nothin’ else to do.”  If things were normal between them, he probably would have gone to Harry’s office, let Harry reassure him that he did well on his exam, and had nothing to be concerned about. 

Harry swallowed hard at the subtle jab.  His mouth twitched, but his smile did not fall.  “Well, yes.  I suppose after two weeks of exams, you do deserve a moment to yourself.”

“Yeah, jus’ off to find Roxy.  ‘M helpin’ her study.  Last exam tomorrow and all,” he said with a bit more aggression in his voice than he intended. 

 “That’s very kind of you,” Harry praised, showing no sign that Eggsy’s hostile tone registered to him. 

Eggsy just shrugged his shoulders.  “S’nothin’.  She helped me with everythin’.  Figure I owe it to her, since-” _Since you stopped.  Since you didn’t seem to give a fuck if I failed or not.  Since you shut me out._   The sentence was left hanging and both wizards were left stood in tense silence. 

“I’m sure you have nothing to worry about, Eggsy.  Your performance in class has drastically improved and I believe that will show in your exam.”

Eggsy wanted to look away. It was all becoming too much.  Harry was speaking with such sincerity that he felt the anger towards the professor die away, and slowly turn into agony.

He began to shift on his feet.  He needed to get to Roxy.  He hadn’t lost control of his emotions since Christmas when he cried in her arms, and he wasn’t about to.  He needed someone to ground him, and Roxy was that person.

“I only wish to speak with you briefly.  I know you probably want to relax after today, but Eggsy-” the man paused, taking a moment to collect his thoughts.  “When I first started teaching here, you were probably one of my most difficult students.  There have, of course, been others who have showed a complete lack of discipline or interest to learn.  You lacked discipline, Eggsy, but what made you different from the others was your willingness to learn once given the chance.  When I pulled you into my office all those years ago, I had hoped that I could leave a mark.  I wanted you to take my words sincerely and not as just because I was a teacher doing what he must.”

Eggsy tried to tune Harry out.  He had no right to say all this sweet shit when their last proper conversation had essentially been Harry tearing him into microscopic pieces.

Harry had left a mark.  He left a bigger mark than he even realized.  Eggsy was sure that it was a permanent one, and no matter how far he got from this school, that mark was not going to go away.

“You started to prove your abilities in class.  Even other professors commented on the change in your participation—although it wasn’t instant.  You challenged yourself and you’ve adapted so well.  You’ve always had the potential to succeed, you just never put forth the effort.  In these past few years, you have been showing exceptional determination.  I am proud of you, Eggsy.” 

Harry gripped Eggsy’s shoulder, and Eggsy thought he was going to collapse from the weight of his hand.  He always assumed that after Christmas Harry was disappointed, like he failed him.  Hearing those words from Harry had had so much more meaning than the professor knew.

“The Auror department will gain a fine young wizard when you are ready to join.”

Eggsy throat was dry.  His usually cocky demeanour seemed to have vanished that moment.  He usually preened at any praise Harry or others gave him—a way to hide his insecurities—but he was failing to find a reply.  He wanted to say something.  Anything.  ‘ _Thank you_ ’, ‘ _You’re only proud because I’m no longer your responsibility_ ’, ‘ _It’s all because of you_ ’,  and ‘You _jus’ felt sorry for me.  Didn’ wan’ to see me fail any more than I already have_ ’, ‘ _You give me too much credit_ ’, ‘ _Yet you did fuck all when I needed you_ ’. He tried to speak, but nothing came out.

Harry must have taken his stunned silence as his dismissal because his lips turned up once more and stepped past Eggsy.  “Take care, Eggsy.” 

It was a long moment before Eggsy finally found his voice.

“Harry!  Wait.”  He turned around, but found Harry halfway down the hall, not glancing back.  So that was it.  His exams were done.  He was on his way to graduating, never to see this school as a student again. 

Eggsy spent the rest of the walk to the library replaying Harry’s words.  Harry was still proud of him.  Even after how badly he had fucked everything up, Harry was still proud of him.  The thought should have made him so happy, but it didn’t.  He was proud, but Eggsy knew Harry still remembered that night.  He was proud of his skills, but not proud of him as a wizard. 

The worst part was, Harry had already bid him farewell, and it had done nothing but leave a sour taste in his mouth.  He still had so much he wanted to tell Harry.  He wasn’t going to apologize; to explain himself, but the stubborn professor had lived up to his promise: they would never speak of that last night in his office. 

He paused in front of the library, stchooling his emotions.  He had to talk to Roxy, but after her exam.  She didn’t need the distraction.  It wasn’t fair.

Squaring his shoulders and straightening his back—something Harry had taught him.  Shit.  Even something like walking reminded him of Harry fucking Hart.  He strode into the large room.

Several tables were filled with large groups, all of which were studying.  He walked towards the back, spotting Roxy at a table by the window with several textbooks open and a long roll of parchment with neatly printed notes scattered across it.

He slumped into the chair across from Roxy without a word.  The witch looked up at the movement and let out a small gasp.

“So, how did it go?”

Eggsy, despite his promise to not let his bitterness show, wasn’t off to a good start.

“Eh.  Not sure it’ll be helpin’ me get into the Ministry.”

Roxy offered a sympathetic smile.  She knew that it was the one exam Eggsy wasn’t confident in.  Well, he wasn’t confident in any of them, except for Potions and Defence Against the Dark Arts. However, this one he was pretty much sure he failed.

“’S not like it matters. “  Eggsy watched Roxy close the book she was reading and switch it with another.  “We’ve got you to worry about.”  He grabbed the book Roxy had just picked up, flipping to a random page.

“Eggsy?”  The girl furrowed her brows.  She had known Eggsy long enough to be able to read through his fake smile.  Something was up, and it wasn’t because of the prospect of failing his exam.  “Is something wrong?”

Eggsy looked at the text on the pages; it meant nothing to him.  He thought about telling her, but again, it wasn’t fair to drag Roxy into this.  It was his problem to deal with.  “Everythin’s fine.” He gave her a large smile.  Even he knew it looked forced, but Roxy didn’t comment on it, and he was grateful.

*****

The last day finally came.  Everyone had everything packed, and was prepared to leave for the ride back to London.  Eggsy was alone in his room, deciding to stay a moment after Ryan and Jamal left.  He wanted to take everything in one last time. 

All his belongings were packed safely in his trunk, which had been taken to the train already.  The bed had been stripped, to be cleaned for September’s new students.  It was funny, he had spent a better part of a year living here, making this his home, and in less than a day all evidence that he had once inhabited this room was gone. 

This had to be a metaphor for life or some cheesy shit like that.  Never had the idea of leaving something behind hurt so much and yet excite him at the same time.  He was going mental with all the random emotions.

He grabbed his bag from the bed and slipped it over his shoulder.  This was it.  He took one last look around the room before pulling the door open and heading out.

He met Roxy by the Great Hall.  She was wearing jeans and a white button-up with a light brown blazer.  They walked together to the dock where dozens of wooden boats were waiting for the seventh years.

Charlie and his followers were already in a boat, waiting to head back to the train.  He looked impatient and Eggsy was tempted to ride by him just so his boat might just _accidentally_ cause the trolls’ to capsize. 

“Are you ready?”  Roxy smiled softly, touching Eggsy’s arm.  They were standing at the boats, the same boats they had used to cross to the lake when they’d first come to Hogwarts.  As if this day couldn’t have gotten any more bittersweet.

“Yeah. ‘M ready.” Eggsy let Roxy into the boat first.  She took a seat on the second bench, sliding over for him. 

He turned around, glancing at the crowd of seventh years.  He gazed at the castle, standing tall and imposing in the background.  It was a clear, warm day.  Too bright for the mood he was in.  This was the day he had waited for, for months, but now, he didn’t want it to be here. 

He didn’t want to leave this life behind.  He didn’t want to just have his memories, but at the same time, leaving all this behind was going to help him move on.

He had tried to talk to Harry after the encounter following his exam, but had failed to find the professor.  He didn’t know if that was worse than when Harry was curt and cold with him during his final months of the year.  At least then he still got to see Harry.

Did anyone have any idea how hard it was to go a week without finding someone when they knew they were in the same fucking castle? 

He wanted to leave a letter along with the (still tainted) Christmas gift, but that just wasn’t him and he didn’t want the possibility of the letter finding its way to the wrong person.  And the quill had meant too much to him to just leave it on Harry’s desk with the possibility of it being tossed away. 

He was leaving so much unsaid.  He did want to thank Harry properly, but even then Harry had denied him that.  Harry denied him his feelings, when they never belonged to the professor to begin with, but he also denied him the chance to show his gratitude to a wizard who had given him a chance when everyone else had given up on him.

Harry Hart believed in Eggsy, but he had also destroyed him... and at the same time, made him stronger. Eggsy had no idea how it made sense, but it did.

He tore his gaze from the castle and stepped into the boat.  He took a seat next to Roxy.  Two Gryffindors joined them and their boat floated off, following the others.  They rocked a little as the boat settled against the water. 

“I can’t believe this is it,” Roxy sighed, giving a short laugh.  “Seven years and now we’re done.  We’re not coming back.”  At least, they wouldn’t come back as students.

“Doesn’t feel real jus’ yet.”  This was just the boat ride.  They still had the train ride home, but shit, he hadn’t thought that today would be so emotional.

“I know.  I feel like we’ll be back here in September.  I don’t want to leave, but I can’t wait for what’s next.  Starting at the Ministry. It’s all going to happen so fast.  Nothing will be the same anymore.”

No, nothing would be the same.  Eggsy knew in time he would adjust to life outside of Hogwarts.  He knew in time he’d get over his professor.  As Harry had said, he was young: he didn’t know what he really wanted.  What he wanted now would change.  His love for Harry would fade.  He hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't give up on me! I am planning on a one-shot continuation where Harry and Eggsy meet again.
> 
> Knowing me, the one-shot won't stay short for long. I have the outline all written out, but I just need to find the time to work on it. Hopefully, I will have it out soon. :) 
> 
> As much as this ending excites me, I'm not completely heartless and going to leave Eggsy with a shattered opinion of love. There's hope. He just has to grow a little.
> 
> The sequel: Open Wounds is now up!


End file.
